Chuck Woolery Takes Questions From ‘Barack,‘ ’Hillary’ & ‘Nancy’ on the Impending ‘Zombie Apocalypse’
- Posted on February 9, 2012 at 6:57am by
Billy Hallowell
- Print »
- Email »
We’ve brought you legendary television personality and game-show host Chuck Woolery‘s comical PSAs before. Rather than continuing to bring us joy through his former shows “Love Connection” and “Wheel of Fortune,” the well-known personality is taking a more political tone, as he has tackled American foreign oil dependency, Obama’s alleged class warfare rhetoric, the Occupy movement and government spending, among other subjects. Now, he’s back with a new clip about the impending zombie apocalypse.
“My fellow Americans, you may have heard of all the recent concern about a zombie apocalypse,” he opens. “I’m happy to report that our federal government is leading the charge on protecting us from zombies.”
He then goes on the mention the Centers for Disease Control and the survival manual that the government offered last year to help Americans survive potential calamity at the hands of ravenous zombies (we published a report last may about the government’s light-hearted zombie blog post entitled, “Social Media: Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse”).
“I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel all warm inside knowing that my tax dollars are hard at work preparing our nation for the eventual takeover by infected, brain-eating undead,” he continued.
He then goes on to say that the government’s guidelines are missing some essential information. So, he takes questions from three unsuspecting individuals who are clearly concerned about what’s to come. Their names? Obama, Hillary, and Nancy (I think you know where this is going). All three are immensely concerned about how they can protect themselves from the zombies.
“I hear that it’s easy to confuse a zombie with a government employee. How do I tell the difference?,” Hillary asks.
“Very good question, Hillary. Although it’s quite easy to confuse a government worker for a zombie, there are telltale signs to look for,” Woolery says. “As a rule, zombies tend to walk faster, while government workers are identifiable by their short-sleeve dress shirts, clip-on ties and a lanyard with an I.D. saying IRS instead of IR-Dead.”
Nancy’s question, of course, focuses upon “a terrible Botox incident” she has had (Woolery says she looks like she was “trapped in a windtunnel”). The famed host recommends she wear a mask to protect herself against the zombies.
Watch the hilarious video, below:
Popular Stories
Does Misstated Marathon Claim Prove Paul Ryan Is Dishonest? (POLL) 672 Comments
‘Jumah at the DNC’ Speaker: ‘Muslims Visited America Prior to Columbus’ & ‘It Was a Muslim’ Who Guided Him to the ‘New World’ 527 Comments
Paper Details Obama Admin’s Alleged Secret Note Sent to Iran: If Israel Attacks, We Won’t Get Involved 392 Comments
Obama: RNC Like Watching ‘Black-and-White TV’ Because Romney ‘Did Not Offer a Single New Idea’ 369 Comments
Roseanne Barr: Most Billionaires ‘Violent Pedophiles’ & ‘Heartless’ Cocaine Addicts 327 Comments
Faith
This Is the Creationists‘ Response to Scientist Bill Nye’s Viral Pro-Evolution Video Claiming They Harm Children 262 Comments- Pakistani Muslim Cleric Accused of Framing Disabled Christian Girl in Koran-Burning Case Read More
- ‘Made Up Religion’: TV Historian Enrages Muslims, Receives Threats After Producing UK Documentary Questioning Islam’s Beginnings 272 Comments
Meet the Controversial German Imam Accused of Brutally Beating His Wife & Pushing Sharia Law Read More
‘Self-Proclaimed Messiah’ & Unification Church Leader the Rev. Sun Myung Moon Has Died — Here’s His Life Story Read More
Business
President Obama Issues Major ‘Green Energy’ Executive Order 127 Comments- Germany’s Upcoming Court Ruling Will be Huge for the EU Read More
Ford Looks to Beat Toyota for Best-Selling Car in 2012 With This Model 147 Comments
Bernanke & QE3: Here’s What You Need to Know Read More- ‘Extortion’: Why Did the Labor Department ‘Drop the Hammer’ on Oregon Farmers? 300 Comments
Technology
- This Is the Creationists‘ Response to Scientist Bill Nye’s Viral Pro-Evolution Video Claiming They Harm Children 262 Comments
‘TaserDrone’: Hackers Weaponize Quadcopter With Actual ‘Shocking’ Technology Read More
Ever Heard of the Wild ‘Burning Man’ Festival in the Middle of the Nev. Desert? Here’s Your Primer Read More
Stanford Develops Technology ‘Better Than Steroids’ for Athlete Recovery Read More
Have You Pretended to Know What ‘the Cloud’ Is? You’re Not Alone Read More
Submitting your tip... please wait!
Comments (72)
Noahide Ron
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:30amI don’t have to run faster than a Zombie,
Report Post »I just have to run faster than you.
And if Zombies attack I’m going to trip you anyway. . .}}}G{{{
tharpdevenport
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 1:24pmThere’s always somebody faster. And then there’s a guy on a bike.
Report Post »Mr.Fitnah
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:04pmIll shoot you in the leg.
Report Post »Redmanblackdog
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:22amWith all the airheads in Washington, Chuck will have a field day. Fox news should pick him up for commentary and get rid of Colmes, Williams, Geraldo and the rest of the brain dead zombies on the station.
Report Post »Gary Fishaholic
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:37amGood idea, loved the video!
Report Post »Casmige
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 3:26pmGREAT IDEA I also Agree!!
Cheers for the great suggestion.
Now if only the Punt-heads (My Take on the Pundits) will take notice AND Listen to the less elite than themselves (They know oh so much better, don’t they??)
Report Post »MarsBarsTru7
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 6:07pmNo kidding!
Are you Native American REDMAN?
Report Post »religiousfreedom
Posted on February 10, 2012 at 7:29pmI agree!!!!!!
Report Post »jackgillum
Posted on February 13, 2012 at 10:27pmHey REDMAN< I agree with you!!!!!!!
Report Post »GeorgieJo
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:04amLMAO Thanks Chuck
That was great!!!
Sheeela JackoLee and DebbyWaspySchulzee should be in next video
Take about badly needed makeovers!!!!!!!
Zombies Must Go ZMG!!!!!!!!!!!!
Report Post »ChiefGeorge
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:15amThe NT states that the DEAD in Christ shall rise FIRST, then those of us who remain will be caught up in the air.
Now imagine a world sometime in the near future…like next week. Graves are empty all over the world, millions have disappeared. Total chaos ensues! The first thing in many a persons mind would be who is the un-dead-dead among them? Raggity people walking around who in reality are now homeless, hungry and desperate. There is your zombie and with the mentality being prepared with regards to the imaginary zombie attack, now here you are right in the middle of it. What do you do? You kill them like the movies taught you. Programming anyone? Satan is preparing his children to live in a world after the the event the Bible describes and some call the rapture.
Report Post »Bill Rowland
Posted on February 10, 2012 at 6:07am@Georgiejo: Don’t for get Liz Warren, Barbara Boxer, Diane Fienstien, Revs Al and Jackson,Charlie Rangel et al. They are l know for their illogical logic, and often seem other worldly.
OMG
Report Post »Bill Rowland
Posted on February 10, 2012 at 6:09amSorry, but I forgot Harry Reed, he has ben dead so long it’s easy to overlook him.
OMG
Report Post »GrumpyCat
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:41am“I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel all warm inside knowing that my tax dollars are hard at work preparing our nation for the eventual takeover by infected, brain-eating undead,”
Eventual, he says? One glance at Nancy Pelosi and I’d say its already started.
Report Post »jand777
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:40amThe straight face thing Chuck does gets me too. Do not know how he does it. I would be rolling over. Very funny stuff. Good work, Chuck.
Report Post »AmazingGrace8
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 11:26amOlder generation remember Jack Benny who was good at keeping a straight-face and he was one of our best comedian. He would fold one arm and the other arm and hand to his face and say, “Well”! I know you had to be there but it was funny. Benny was known to be very “stingy” with his money and the classic joke: Benny was approached by a robber and the robber said, “Your money or your life”! after a few minutes, the robber asked, “Well”?….and Benny answered, “I’m thinking,I’m thinking”!
Report Post »pamela kay
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:43pmJAND777, I thiught the same thing. LOL…:)
Report Post »kathleenlee
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:26amLMAO…I Love this guy…well done
Report Post »3monkeysmomma
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:48amMe too. Chuck will save us!
I just hope the next “Zombie Apocalypse” isn’t as bad as the one we had in November of 2008!
Report Post »G-WHIZ
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:21amOne question for C.W.: How do you do it , with such a straight face?? HEE–HEe–Hee-hee….. .
Report Post »MittensKittens
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:12amThat is funny stuff…BTW the link for the CDC is real…go figure!
Report Post »Stoic one
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 10:10amfunny!
Report Post »Meyvn
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 9:42amHehe
Report Post »RJJinGadsden
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:57amExcellent video Chuck. It should have included that other Chuck. Schumer. But, that would probably have doubled the run time. Hope to see some follow ups to this theme.
Report Post »RJJinGadsden
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 9:17amGeez, just flipped over to BSNBC for a quick laugh and was I ever wrong. The first thing on the screen was a huge head shot of Barbara Boxer. She is about to catch up with Nancy Pelose on that caught in a wind tunnel look. Apparently, Chuck’s program could fill an entire season with California politicians.
Report Post »whereareyourbrains
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:51amEntertaining. Makes you smile…………
Report Post »65Mustang
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:34amFinally, something that makes me know I‘m not the only one disgusted by what’s going on in D.C. Loved it.
Report Post »McNamara
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:30amThis is excellent. Make sure to by some ZombieMax ammo. Just in case it is the democrats.
Report Post »RagingJudge
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 2:11pmIt’s not right to insult zombies in such a manner.
Report Post »Buck Shane
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:24amExcellent
Report Post »Miyegombo Bayartsogt
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:09amI truly believe “Zombe Apocalypse” is just code words when you really mean ‘giant, flesh eating lizards who are taking over the government and economy of the entire global community.” No doubt every cold blooded, giant, flesh-eating lizard knows just who is being referred to when people say “brain eating undead.”
Report Post »itsmyfirstday
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 8:04amChuck for President!
Report Post »Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:53amExcellent.
Report Post »JUSTANOTHEROPINION
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:36amNow that’s how to tell the truth about the sad state of affairs without scaring the heck out of people. Funny, funny, Funny. You go Chuck!
Report Post »SpankDaMonkey
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:32am.
Report Post »Chuck, your looking to get Audited aren’t you?……………
CatB
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:28amWhat is that phone ringing in the background? .. my dog doesn’t like it ;-)
Report Post »bigdaddyt46
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:28amthat was funny. i agree the mask just made her look more satanic, but is needed because that face has been shriveling male genitalia for decades
Report Post »obamamustgo
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:21amFunny
Report Post »MONICNE
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:11amThis is really clever, at least it is not Saturday Night Live, so it will actually be funny and show some class!
TEA
Report Post »Impenitent
Posted on February 9, 2012 at 7:05amhilarious…
the mask wasn’t that much of an improvement however…
Report Post »