Flashback: When NPR Retold Christmas Story With Hybrids and ‘Wise People’
- Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:29pm by
Jonathon M. Seidl
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In 2007,* NPR aired a Christmas special that included its favorite Christmas stories told by some of its favorite authors and contributors. The special included Scott Simon telling a new version of the birth of Jesus, complete with FEMA and Katrina references, as well as hybrid cars and the politically correct “wise people” instead of “wise men.”
So why talk about something three years old? Well, NPR is once again featuring the special under its “Holidays 2010” and “NPR’s Holiday Favorites” categories.
Here’s the new four minute Christmas story. Notice how the narrator opens with saying that the original Christmas story occurred two centuries ago, which would have put Jesus’s birth around the early 1700s 1800s. I hope she meant “millennia” instead of centuries:
The full program can be heard here.
But that’s not all, Simon tweaked his new Katrina Christmas story two years later in 2009, this time it featured Mary and Joseph losing their unemployment benefits:
Joseph and Mary hitchhiked to an abandoned factory near Cleveland. Their unemployment compensation had run out. Joseph was a carpenter, but the only work going on in his neighborhood was boarding up storefronts. He and Mary had no place to live; and Mary was pregnant.
She told Joseph that he would be the child’s father, but he wasn’t the child’s father. The spark that began the life of their child, she said, came from—well, it was too embarrassing and ridiculous for Joseph to repeat.
Friends told him he was being taken for a fool. But Joseph loved Mary; he knew that the last few months had been hard. He decided that whatever fantastic stories Mary told him, he would love the child as his own.
That night, Mary had a baby boy. He seemed healthy, wrinkly, and had a nice, loud cry. Mary swaddled their baby in old copies of bankrupt newspapers and laid him down in the back of an abandoned car.
A stray gray dog, grimy from the road and whimpering with loneliness, kept watch over the baby and warmed him with her panting. Joseph also put his iPhone close, so their baby could be lulled to sleep with a lullaby app.
That night, a star appeared in the east. Three Wise Persons—Warren Buffett, Alexander McCall Smith, and Monica Ali—came to behold Joseph and Mary’s child.
They wanted to bring the child gold, frankincense, and myrrh. But they hadn’t been available since Lehman Brothers collapsed. So the Wise People brought gift cards to Chipotle. The infant saw them and smiled.
Mary saw the look of delight in her child’s face and said to herself, “He’s happy with us.” But she saw Joseph sitting by himself at the far end of the garage. She knew he was worried about how he was going to make a life for their child. When Joseph came back to the car, his eyes glimmered.
“I think I finally understand,” he said. “Why we’ve been given the gift of this child. It doesn’t matter who the father is, does it? Every child cries for our love and deserves our care. Every child who is hungry in Sudan, or cold in Cleveland. Every little girl who is abandoned by a roadside in China. Every little boy in Congo who‘s dragged into someone’s army. Every little boy and girl anywhere who is threatened by an epidemic, an explosion, or indifference—I must love them as a father loves his child.”
Mary and Joseph sat with their arms around each other, and their baby boy. The dog—whom they decided to adopt on the spot—hopped up on the seat beside them and put her head gently onto Joseph’s lap. The star that had found them seemed to stay above them for a moment while their child breathed softly, safely, peacefully in their arms, looking out at a world that seemed suddenly new.
Author’s note: Some may argue that this is simply satire. That may be true. But just think what kind of outrage would occur if an NPR contributor satirized Hanukkah, Kwanza, or Ramadan, or “retold” the story of Muhammed and changed key details. I’m sure the Muslim community would be up in arms.
*The audio notes that the original report is from 2005, which is when Simon’s story first aired. However it re-aired as part of the Christmas compilation in 2007, too.
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Comments (64)
mrmikejohnson
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:53pmIn January, the Republican congress should quickly defund NPR. That should be an easy slam dunk after the firing of Juan Williams.
Report Post »tugdiver
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:36pmnow some future president of a ivy league college can erase the original story and in one generation we have a president chopping down a cherry tree. lol
Report Post »koyettsu
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:35pmIt is amazing to me that people find NPR worthwhile, granted not many people find it worthwhile but still amazing. Lets all say a special prayer this Christmas to please cut public funding for NPR.
Report Post »DreWells
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:07pmOur gov’t is officially a proganda machine.
Report Post »psykeskaos
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:54pmLove the new Night Before Christmas!! And I agree it is in very bad taste. Proves just how out of touch and elitist the Left really is. I can’t believe tax dollars pay for this garbage. I wonder what the FCC has to say about NPR’s bias…
Report Post »BNSFPD
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:45pmIsn’t this just pathetic? And our hard earned tax money flows to these morons . . .
Report Post »Lucy Larue
Posted on December 21, 2010 at 6:23pmAmen BNSFPD. AfreakingMEN!
Report Post »How can they take the most beautiful story of the birth of Jesus and make it CHEESY?
It just shows that these “People” think that they are the Creme De La Creme of intelligence.
The rest of us will suck up whatever idiocy they want to espouse because they are they.
Well….., THEY make me ill! And….,they are mental midgets! UGH!
Topcat
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:32pmThats only funny to people, that didnt happen to . With so many people unemployed and so many not eligible any longer for unemployment, and in the street , or headed there , I think the whole story is in bad taste and should not be aired. This is a serious problem and should not be made light of.
Report Post »Cherished Emblems
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:28pmYou can celebrate the meaning of Christmas all year with our Savior Medallion in Gold or Silver finishes.
http://www.cherishedemblems.com/collections/frontpage/products/the-savior
Report Post »hauschild
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:24pmUh, that’s a female? Gadzooks?!?!?
Report Post »inferno
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:12pmSince Mary and Joseph were just visitors and not residents, today’s Progressives would have charged them a bed tax. They would also have been cited for having the wrong kind and too many animals. They would however, have been entitled fto AFDC benefits, and perhaps food stamps had Joseph deserted Mary and the baby Jesus. The governmnet giveth and the government taketh away. They would have been condemned for displaying a Nativity scens. This is a microcism of the type of world we live in in 2010.
Report Post »wash1776
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:11pmNo surprise there. NPR is full of communists and liberal progressives these days.
Report Post »jasongraham
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:57pmWell it look’s like they got a new bong over there at NPR.
Report Post »stephenb.net
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:56pm@ votebushin12: you wrote “It is a testament to the miracle of the event not a degradation.”
Miracle of WHAT event? The story NPR tells is of a woman who cheats on her husband (technically betrothed) and Joseph decides because he loves her he will ignore her made up story. That isn’t a miracle, it’s a lie.
The miracle is that Mary, a virgin was pregnant with the savior and gave birth to a child that would forever change the future for all who believed and followed His teachings. That is the miracle we celebrate this time of year and not the Godless PC garbage spewed by an arrogant progressive jackass.
Report Post »Mikee T
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 7:56pmAnd I wonder where the Progressive Baptist Black Leaders are on this crap ? I mean, after all, don’t Jesse and Al refer to themselves as Reverends ? Aren’t Reverends God Fearing Christians ? Are not god fearing christians defenders and believers in the gospel of Jesus Christ ? Aren’t they a little outraged at someone making “light” of something as sacred as our savior’s birth ? I’m confused…how can you be a liberal / progressive and a devout christian at the same time ? Hypocrisy, that’s how……..period……..amen……
Report Post »warner
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:49pmSomeday these folks are going to have to answer for these actions! I feel sorry for them…they are so blinded by Satan. They are living for the world and the world alone. Judgement Day is a comin’…
Report Post »OtterPop
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:48pmNevermind Joseph’s unemployment benefits running out, they left out that Mary and Joseph went to Cleveland to be TAXED.
The bit about the real father being too ridiculous to relate sounds like blasphemy. The actual account tells that Joseph was assured personally by a special messenger of the nature of his wife’s pregnancy. Simon, the author of this account, literally rapes this version of it’s details for his own twisted purposes.
Report Post »bigdaddybernie
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:36pmThey are cousins of ……Pravda Reporting Service
Report Post »bigdaddybernie
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:33pmBYE BYE………………Nationalische Politboro Report……………
Report Post »southernloyalty
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:06pmNotice the left never seems to have a problem with Hanuka or Ramadan. Its always strictly anti Christian. This shows its obvious either that athiest are not behind this because an athiest would be opposed to all religious holidays or that athiesm is just code for “I hate Christians.” However, I don’t believe it is the athiest at all. The main organizations throwing money behind the anti Christmas thing happen to be very religious and very liberal. They overwelmingly helped Obama get into office, and recently lit the biggest menorah in the world right in front of the white house on public grounds. Seperation of church and state??? Now imagine setting up a cross or nativity scene, on public ground, right in front of the white house. Oh the horror. As Orwell said, “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.”
Report Post »Boca Blonde
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:05pmI love how this guy’s “Joseph” is homeless, but still has an iPhone. Just shows you the messed up standards the left has. Absolutely ridiculous.
Report Post »DashRipRock
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:04pmTwas the night before Rhama-hana-Quans-Mas
Report Post »and all throught the White House
Not a Liberal was stirring
nor Barney Fwank in his blouse
the radical laws were signed
in the Oval office with care
in fear that the Tea Party soon would be there
The lefties were restless not snug in thier beds
while taking over this country danced in thier heads
When on the Capitol steps there arose such a clatter
Harry Ried looked out to see whats the matter
When what to his blurry eyes did appear
the Tea party Congress to a grateful nations cheer
With one mighty driver and all hands on deck
he knew in a moment it was the work of Glenn Beck.
The FCC and Al Sharpton will try as they may
but they cant silence us now or any other day.
We will never lie down or sit in the back
this is our country too and were taking it back.
chfields62
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:03pmVery good!!! Merry Christmas and Amen!!
Report Post »SheriS
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:25pmGreat statement! As more and more people become aware and awake as to what their corrupt, inept, pathetic govenment is really doing, there will be more and more of us and fewer of the thems! NPR, many of our newspapers and if the “radio voices” are forced off the air we will have each other to spread the word! God bless all who are awake and alert to these “idiots” led by our current President! Merry Christmas to all and keep alert as you celebrate our most special day of the year! JESUS’ BIRTHDAY!
Report Post »chuckganc
Posted on December 21, 2010 at 10:58pmLove it!
Report Post »Diane TX
Posted on December 22, 2010 at 12:06am@ DashRipRock
I really like the poem. Is it yours ?
Report Post »FreedomAdvocate
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:01pmIt probably is just satire – but not sure NPR should be doing this, and it is clearly with a particular political angle in mind.
Report Post »cheezwhiz
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:26pmIn the shelters for illegal mexicans a k a “ barrio churchs” in CA, they are portraying illegals as
Report Post »“ immigrants” who are just like Joseph and Mary , and ofcourse every anchor baby is Jesus
( er..Hesoos). They are openly blabbing to kids how rich whie men (= Republicans) hate latinos and are therefore against God. They are actually organizing for DREAM act protests now.
Its Christmas..they can do it !!
cheezwhiz
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:27pmIn the shelters for illegal mexicans a k a “ barrio churchs” in CA, they are portraying illegals as
Report Post »“ immigrants” who are just like Joseph and Mary , and ofcourse every anchor baby is Jesus
( er..Hesoos). They are openly blabbing to kids how rich white men (= Republicans) hate latinos and are therefore against God. They are actually organizing for DREAM act protests now.
Its Christmas..they can do it !!
marhee9
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:58pm@Texpilot – We know exactly what they would do. Look at the Danish cartoonist.
Report Post »FreedomAdvocate
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:06pmI agree, religious satire is fair game in my mind, but if they are afraid to satire some, then they should refrain from satiring all – because it is hypocracy to leave those who deserve it most scott free. Why should Christianity be villainize simply because they are more tolerant of criticism (and such criticism continues to undermine the very religion which is the most tolerant).
Report Post »trolltrainer
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:50pmMerry Christmas NPR…
Report Post »13thgenerati0namerican
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:38pm2ndiesssssssssssssssss
untameable-kate
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 8:00pmSorry guys, I just couldn’t get through it. Some times the BS is just too much.
Report Post »marhee9
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:31pmThey did a special on this at donsmithshow.com. Liberals always want to rewrite history. I say Merry Christmas to all.
cnsrvtvj
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:37pmThat video they have on Al Sharpton vs. Rush Limbaugh is excellent. I never heard most of those things the “good” Reverend said. That was amazing.
lovenfl3
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:38pmExactly Marhee9. That was a great show this weekend. The Clinton interview was hilarious.
BlazingPatriot
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:40pmAgain, here is tax-supported NPR using a double standard. The christian community should be irate over this foolishness. …… This bias has got to stop !!!
Report Post »lovenfl3
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:43pmCouldn’t agree more Blazing. I thought they were defunding these guys.
Report Post »Camo Pants
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:51pmand to all the politicaly correct people, a union filled night. :)
Report Post »TXPilot
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 2:54pmI wonder what the Muslims would say if the birth and life of their precious Muhammed was re-written in such a manner? Just goes to show, that if any person or group wants to have someone to ridicule or discriminate against, then Christians are fair game. Don’t know about everyone else, but I’m tired of taking it.
Report Post »Marcobob69
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:05pmI’d like to know why the American taxpayer is still footing the bill for this organization. It’s way past time to DE-FUND this biased organization! AND, they can take their political correctness and shove it where the sun don’t shine!
Report Post »VoteBushIn12
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:23pm50 bucks says a Christian wrote this story – It is a testament to the miracle of the event not a degradation. And to the author’s unnecessarily presumptuous “note” at the end I feel compelled to say only this, YOU are the problem. To assume other religions’ offenses and then hold those unfounded preconceived ideas against them is what is wrong with this world. It is as if you walked up to someone on the street and chastised them for a dream you had the night before in which they stole an item of yours. Your projections of reality are no substitute for it.
For those of us not jaded, this is a lovely and honoring story. Good job NPR.
Report Post »GeauxAlready
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 3:56pmMerry Christmas Everybody………
Report Post »wash1776
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 4:10pmYou are so right Marhee. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU TOO~~
Report Post »independentvoteril
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:34pmBlazingPatriot.. Christian‘s might be irate but they don’t listen to NPR.. so they never see it.. My mother use to listen to it but even she couldn’t take their nonsense anymore.. and that was just the regular shows.. she thought they were a bunch of boobs.. BTW my ma was a DEMOCRAT who decided not no more.. the DEMOCRATS were no longer the party they use to be..
Report Post »snowleopard3200 {mix art}
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 5:52pmHow about this story for NPR “How you went out of business due to your extreme levels of bigotry and bias on the airwaves.”
http://www.artinphoenix.com/gallery/grimm
Curator_JDR
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:24pmWho wrote that story? Barbara Ehrenrich who called Jesus a “wine guzzling vagrant socialist” in her book “Nickel and Dimed” which many high school students now have to read.
The disrespect is disgusting, but its “cool” to be like that.
How have these “cool” yet destructive mantras infiltrated political, cultural and social institutions. Its not all Bill Ayers. It comes from the Dada Manifesto (1918) which the Progressives adopted. One artist I curate, Marc Rubin, learned about them from Salvador Dali who was their original enemy. Only Dali knew the true intent of the Dadas, and he walked away in disgust and protest.
This viral video expose “Dada – The Enemy of Liberty” explains. http://www.marcrubin.com/dada2.ivnu
Report Post »WhiteFang
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 6:52pmWhat a bunch of total nonsense.
Report Post »101
Posted on December 20, 2010 at 9:12pmThis would never happen in America…
Soros funds NPR and the American tax payer pickup the rest of the tab so NPR can promote communism. WTF
http://commieblaster.com/george-soros-fund/index.html
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