World

‘Jihad Cosmo’: Al Qaeda Launches New Women’s Magazine

Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:41am by Jonathon M. Seidl
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What do you get when you combine bombs and beauty, marriage tips and jihad? That’s easy: Al Qaeda‘s new women’s magazine, “Al-Shamikha,“ or ”The Majestic Woman.”

The new 31-page, glossy magazine is believed to be produced by the same media wing of Al Qaeda behind the flashy, English-language terrorist magazine “Inspire.” That magazine is said to have an American-born jihadi author, Samir Khan.

Called “Jihad Cosmo” by some, the London Telegraph explains what you can expect to see inside.

“Much like Elle or Cosmopolitan, it includes advice on finding the right man (‘marrying a mujahideen’), how to achieve a perfect complexion … , and provides tips on first aid and etiquette,” the paper says.

The magazine also features interviews with martyr’s wives, who support their husbands’ choices to die during jihad. The magazine agrees: “From martyrdom, the believer will gain security, safety and happiness.”

But it’s not all about dying for the cause. There’s also practical advice, like telling women not to leave the house “except when necessary,” arguing the pros and cons of honey facemasks, and a warning against “towelling too forcibly.” There’s even a “beauty column,” the Daily Mail explains, which instructs women to stay indoors with their faces covered to keep a “clear complexion,” and says they should wear a niqab — a full body burkha — for “rewards by complying with the command of Allah Almighty.”

The magazine’s editor, Saleh Youssef, explains the periodical‘s goal in the first edition’s introduction:

Because women constitute half of the population – and one might even say that they are the population since they give birth to the next generation – the enemies of Islam are bent on preventing the Muslim woman from knowing the truth about her religion and her role, since they know all too well what would happen if women entered the field of jihad… The nation of Islam needs women who know the truth about their religion and about the battle and its dimensions and know what is expected of them.

“Al-Qaeda see how effective magazines are at pushing the ideals of western culture and want to try the same thing,” James Brandon at anti-extremism think tank Quilliam told the Mail. “As a result they have come up with a jihadist’s version of Cosmopolitan magazine.”

Plans are already in place for the second installment, which promises to deliver tips on exfoliation and electronic jihad.

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Comments (131)

Lost In Space
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:46am
I believe this mag would end up on the floor next to the toilet were the modern jihadist would be useing it for wiping his backside.
in the fine print it probally says somewhere,for propaganda use only.
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Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:35am
How about some of their advertisers:

“CIA: We know where you are..maybe…
“Marines: We will see you shortly…say your prayers…
“Army: Teed off with terrorists…and loving it…
“Air Force: This MOAB is for you…
“Navy: Tomahawk seeking Bin Lauden Home…
“Caves for rent, if the one you want is occupied, call the Marines at ###

Sarcasm is totally intentional and directed at the terrorists…
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branch manager
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:32am
“knowing the truth about her religion and roll.” = Shut your mouth and cover yourself.
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cheezwhiz
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:27am
Plans are already in place for the second installment, which promises to deliver tips on exfoliation and electronic jihad.
————————–
Electronic jihad ?
Hmmmm….
Wonder if they’ll need Blackberries for that ?
http://tkcollier.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/368-blackberry-burqa4.jpg?w=342&h=440
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poverty.sucks
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:22am
Stoned to death for Adultry is the thing of the past with our tear out pages to Contract Marriage brought to you by legal boom. Whether you want to be married for an hour (if he has can last that long), days, weeks or months, our easy to fill out contracts provide all the legal aspects that will hold up any Muslim court of law. Pay close attention to the part where he should use his real name, how much he’s supposed to pay and most importantly, get some payment up front, after his disappointing performance, he’ll blame you and not pay.
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loadingmyclips
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:21am
I’m not a womens rights guy andI like my women with a little feminity. You know preferrably the one last name type,not not a fox-piven . I don’t care if they can cook or not, I’ll do that(and clean-up) they are not my galley slave. The stuff in this magazine is pure garbage and I can not fathom how any woman could follow this stuff !?! Shocked is the only thing I can say about the magazines content. Shocked and feeling sorry for the people who might actually believe this crap. Their leaders are using them like chattel, not humans.
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- PoohbearA2
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 10:00pm
  Not a women’s rights guy? Why not? Wouldn’t you want your “feminine” gal to be free to choose you? Wouldn’t you like to know that it was her choice to take your name when it was so generously offered to her? I think deep down, you are a women’s rights guy. Any guy who offers to clean… I’m thinking is pretty good on the “rights” issue.
  
  p.s. I’m a one last name, very feminine, married woman, whose husband would tell you, demands her equal rights and not one bit more and is glad to ensure that he has his as well!
  Report Post »
EyebrowsLaMana
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:20am
” and provides tips on first aid and etiquette,” the paper says.
What, the articles teach them how to stay silent while being stoned to death as proper etiquette?? Or maybe how to detach while being raped by the nasty smelly, sandy old man that bought you…err, married you against your will..OR even how to arrange your sheets so you do not maintain a relative temperature of 200 degrees.. YUCK, YUCK, and double yuck..
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Bornfree1948
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:10am
I bet there are no deodorant add es in this new magazine
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- Oil_Robb
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:59am
  I agree……but I hear they will advertise hair removal devices…I dont know if they will sell however they are almost as big as the hedge clippers I have hanging in my garage
  Report Post »
popeyebedford
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:10am
You know I don‘t see a bit of advice on how to suck the berrys off a sticker bush without punching holes in one’s lips, as all goats must do. I mean if you’re going to give advice, give advice for a real Muslim woman, whose social status is the same as a farm animal…
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mrsmileyface
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:09am
@Snowleopard You better say that its sacasm to the Blaze or else it will be wiped clean. Case in point 90% of my posts.
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- Cherynn
  Posted on March 15, 2011 at 3:19am
  I know this to be true. It takes alot of nerve to eliminate a veterans first amendment right. Thanks for the editing Blaze!
  Report Post »
cheezwhiz
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:02am
Question :
If Muhamed ElHakim ( a k a Keith Ellison) reads this mag, will he cry ?
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RepubliCorp
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:00am
Back cover ad for C-4 or the AK warehouse?
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cheezwhiz
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:00am
Hey Katie Couric, you got your wish !!
So what if its not a sitcom ..but its something .
Now get yourself an invitation to their office party and show them your famous dance moves
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constitutionparty
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:59am
Maybe we should send a few gift subscriptions to the National Intel Director and Congress.
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Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:57am
Think of some of the wonderful articles they will feature in the next editions…

“USA the great satan after all?
“Ten mistakes to avoid as a suicide bomber…
“Jihadist Corner…recipies and cooking tips for the fighters…
“Upcoming Events: Places to avoid…
“Travel Tips: These places will soon be gone, see them now…
“Camp Guantanamo: Paradise of Cuba with Marine Guards…

Note, all humor is meant to include pure sarcasm and ultimate levels of spite at terrorists.

MARINES RULE against TERRORISTS…
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BIGJAYINPA
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:57am
Fashion tips from Al Quadea, peek-a-boo suicide vests and the right perfume to mask the odor of Semtex, These people crack me up while they scare the snot out of me.
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handsoffmystuff
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:57am
hmmmm…. I still think the entire world of Islam will be shaken to it’s core once they discover … breast implants. In the words of Algernon Hawthorne… “And this positively infantile preoccupation with bosoms. In all time in this wretched Godforsaken country, the one thing that has appalled me most of all this this prepostrous preoccupation with bosoms. Don’t you realize they have become the dominant theme in American culture: in literature, advertising and all fields of entertainment and everything. I’ll wager you anything you like that if American women stopped wearing brassieres, your whole national economy would collapse overnight. “
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- grandmaof5
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:59am
  At least Victoria’s Secret and plastic surgeons would take a hit!
  Report Post »
- Insipid
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 3:33pm
  Natural 34c would be perfect for me ! I don’t get these beautiful young “and older” ladies destorying their bodies with implants and all kinds of crazy tattoos all over their bodies. When they hit their 70s they will look like freaks with balloons in thier chests and melting ice cream running down their bodies.
  Report Post »
cheezwhiz
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:54am
Will Hillary Clinton do an op-ed for this rag ?
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Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:53am
Jihad Cosmo? So I take it there will be such items as the…

“Terrorist weekly: Upcoming Events…
“Advice for the Fanatic: Dying for Allah…
“Allah be Praised: How to go out with a blast…
“Death to all Infedels…
“10 mistakes to avoid as a suicide bomber…
“Is America the ‘great satan’…
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- Marylou7
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:02am
  Your replies are always spot on, thanks.
  Report Post »
- Underground Man
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:33am
  “5 Ways to Tell If Your Son or Daughter is a Zionist-Jew-Pig Sympathizer”
  
  “How to Apply Feng Shui Techniques to Your Cave’s Interior Design”
  Report Post »
- ETOOL USMC RECON
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:37am
  Snow…may I add some possible things in the magazine:
  
  Ads for Sinbad’s Secret….(C4 and plastiqe padded undergarmets complete with Det Cord G string)
  
  “Dying for allah” ….a how to on dying your filthy garments black….so they won’t look so filthy.
  
  “Preparing for your Magic Carpet Ride”…a how to guide to die for a false prophet
  
  Mabe an Op Ed…….”Why aren’t the moooslim leaders killing themselves as well?”
  Report Post »
cheezwhiz
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:52am
I’m sure the hags of The View will promote this mag on their show and give it a few thumsup !!
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- ADNIL
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:04am
  If anyone NEEDED to wear burkas…………..
  Report Post »
- Mainer forever
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:22am
  They all shoud be in burkahs when they do it too.
  Report Post »
- Oil_Robb
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:53am
  Outher than that Hassleback woman, I wish those hideous women on the view would drape about 10 yards of burlap on themselves….That Goldberg woman makes it hard to keep my coffee down
  Report Post »
- REETZBEE
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 2:02pm
  I think Whoopie would sound much better with a full Burka on while hiding those terd-like curls she has hanging in her face all the time.
  Report Post »
poverty.sucks
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:52am
How to make a Jihadist blow his mind would be an interesting article
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- Marylou7
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:00am
  Good one.
  Report Post »
Ironmaan
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:50am
Someone needs to buy those idiots on capital hill who were crying and complaining that the hearings are racist a subscription
http://guerillatics.com
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grandmaof5
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:50am
How to look good for your stoning, or the proper dress for beheading. How about, how to dress better than the other wives, or the latest fashion so your husband won’t beat you at will. Unbelievable! Hollywood had better subscribe to this magazine so they can be ahead of the curve when sharia law comes to town.
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- Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:59am
  Morning Grandmaof5, hope the weather is better and warmer for you today, will be in high eighties and lower ninties this week according to the weathermen; kitty is fine, and shoulder is still hurting yet getting better.
  Report Post »
Gold Coin & Economic News
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:49am
I’m sure their readership will be ZERO.
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Gold Coin & Economic News
Posted on March 14, 2011 at 7:49am
A woman’s magazine from Al Qaeda, that should be interesting since they have no respect for women at all. Beauty Tips Behind The Burka will be their first article.
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- poverty.sucks
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 8:59am
  Accually they are very fashionable buy and wear top designer clothing and jewlery, unfortunately their beauty must be covered when out in public.
  Report Post »
- Obama Bin Lying
  Posted on March 14, 2011 at 12:31pm
  Better Bombs and Garden???
  Report Post »

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