US

Study: 4 in 10 Say Marriage is Becoming Obsolete

WASHINGTON (AP) — Is marriage becoming obsolete?

As families gather for Thanksgiving this year, nearly one in three American children is living with a parent who is divorced, separated or never-married. More people are accepting the view that wedding bells aren’t needed to have a family.

A study by the Pew Research Center highlights rapidly changing notions of the American family. And the Census Bureau, too, is planning to incorporate broader definitions of family when measuring poverty, a shift caused partly by recent jumps in unmarried couples living together.

About 29 percent of children under 18 now live with a parent or parents who are unwed or no longer married, a fivefold increase from 1960, according to the Pew report being released Thursday. Broken down further, about 15 percent have parents who are divorced or separated and 14 percent who were never married. Within those two groups, a sizable chunk — 6 percent — have parents who are live-in couples who opted to raise kids together without getting married.

Indeed, about 39 percent of Americans said marriage was becoming obsolete. And that sentiment follows U.S. census data released in September that showed marriages hit an all-time low of 52 percent for adults 18 and over.

In 1978, just 28 percent believed marriage was becoming obsolete.

When asked what constitutes a family, the vast majority of Americans agree that a married couple, with or without children, fits that description. But four of five surveyed pointed also to an unmarried, opposite-sex couple with children or a single parent. Three of 5 people said a same-sex couple with children was a family.

“Marriage is still very important in this country, but it doesn’t dominate family life like it used to,” said Andrew Cherlin, a professor of sociology and public policy at Johns Hopkins University. “Now there are several ways to have a successful family life, and more people accept them.”

The broadening views of family are expected to have an impact at Thanksgiving. About nine in 10 Americans say they will share a Thanksgiving meal next week with family, sitting at a table with 12 people on average. About one-fourth of respondents said there will be 20 or more family members.

“More Americans are living in these new families, so it seems safe to assume that there will be more of them around the Thanksgiving dinner table,” said Paul Taylor, executive vice president of the Pew Research Center.

The changing views of family are being driven largely by young adults 18-29, who are more likely than older generations to have an unmarried or divorced parent or have friends who do. Young adults also tend to have more liberal attitudes when it comes to spousal roles and living together before marriage, the survey found.

But economic factors, too, are playing a role. The Census Bureau recently reported that opposite-sex unmarried couples living together jumped 13 percent this year to 7.5 million. It was a sharp one-year increase that analysts largely attributed to people unwilling to make long-term marriage commitments in the face of persistent unemployment.

Beginning next year, the Census Bureau will publish new, supplemental poverty figures that move away from the traditional concept of family as a husband and wife with two children. It will broaden the definition to include unmarried couples, such as same-sex partners, as well as foster children who are not related by blood or adoption.

Officials say such a move will reduce the number of families and children who are considered poor based on the new supplemental measure, which will be used as a guide for federal and state agencies to set anti-poverty policies. That’s because two unmarried partners who live together with children and work are currently not counted by census as a single “family” with higher pooled incomes, but are officially defined as two separate units — one being a single parent and child, the other a single person — who aren’t sharing household resources.

“People are rethinking what family means,” Cherlin said. “Given the growth, I think we need to accept cohabitation relationships as a basis for some of the fringe benefits offered to families, such as health insurance.”

Still, the study indicates that marriage isn’t going to disappear anytime soon. Despite a growing view that marriage may not be necessary, 67 percent of Americans were upbeat about the future of marriage and family. That‘s higher than their optimism for the nation’s educational system (50 percent), economy (46 percent) or its morals and ethics (41 percent).

And about half of all currently unmarried adults, 46 percent, say they want to get married. Among those unmarried who are living with a partner, the share rises to 64 percent.

Other findings:

—About 34 percent of Americans called the growing variety of family living arrangements good for society, while 32 percent said it didn’t make a difference and 29 percent said it was troubling.

—About 44 percent of people say they have lived with a partner without being married; for 30-to-49-year-olds, that share rose to 57 percent. In most cases, those couples said they considered cohabitation as a step toward marriage.

—About 62 percent say that the best marriage is one where the husband and wife both work and both take care of the household and children. That’s up from 48 percent who held that view in 1977.

The Pew study was based on interviews with 2,691 adults by cell phone or landline from Oct. 1-21. The survey has a total margin of error of plus or minus 2.6 percentage points, larger for subgroups. Pew also analyzed 2008 census data, and used surveys conducted by Time magazine to identify trends from earlier decades.

___

Online:

http://pewsocialtrends.org

Comments (76)

1 2
  • booger71
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:32pm

    Just a thought

    Many of the Old Testaments Patriarchs would be in prison in today’s world

    Report Post » booger71  
  • heavyduty
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:31pm

    While this poll might show that the numbers are high. There are a lot of these numbers in Hollywood. Where marriage is a convenience not actuality. So their numbers would reflect this also. While I don‘t like someone living together because most usually if they do get married then it won’t last. These numbers also reflect that parents are letting schools raise their children instead of the parents. Hopefully we will get these numbers back down by educating our children on the sanctity of marriage.

    Report Post »  
  • Codger
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:09pm

    Only read the headline and know this is part of the progressive agenda and all I can say bullshi7.

    Report Post » Codger  
  • javasport
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:08pm

    Good! As a member of the now minority, I demand my rights for people to respect my beliefs and leave Marriage the hell alone and stop trying to redefine it.

    Report Post »  
  • missionarydad
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:08pm

    The foundation of American values starts with the family.It is in the home that most great values are not only learned, but practiced and given deep root becoming much of what make up an individual. The family in many cases is the fortress of love, decency, respect for human beings, morals, honor, charity, chastity, hope, industry and strength. This is true in both God fearing and those even those families that are not faith based. Take this away and the state will fill the void with it’s many opposites.

    Report Post »  
  • PC-FIDE
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:04pm

    First the minds then the family. The family has been attacked by the left since the 1950′s.

    Report Post »  
  • Petunia
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:00pm

    This is a result of the “Me” generations focus on selfishness.

    Marriage cannot be maintained on the foundation of selfishness.

    Report Post »  
  • Okpulot Taha
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:55am

    Average divorce rate overall in America:

    First Marriage: 50%
    Second Marriage: 67%
    Third Marriage: 74%

    “Sociologists believe that childlessness is also a common cause of divorce. The absence of children leads to loneliness and weariness and even in the United States, at least 66 per cent of all divorced couples are childless.”

    Other interesting factoids: http://www.divorcerate.org/

    There are significant advantages to tax file as single rather than married. Our tax code favors singles.

    Odds of a lasting marriage are 50 / 50 here in America. Those are not good betting odds. God is not doing a good job with His blessings of marriages.

    Neither heterosexual marriage nor homosexual marriage is a guarantee of good parents. Both parents present or single parent present, this is not a guarantee of good parents nor a good parent.

    Two parents, single parent, straight or gay, has little influence on quality of parenting.

    Okpulot Taha
    Choctaw Nation

    Report Post »  
    • NoName22
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 3:52pm

      There are significant advantages to tax file as single rather than married. Our tax code favors singles.
      ”
      Odds of a lasting marriage are 50 / 50 here in America. Those are not good betting odds. God is not doing a good job with His blessings of marriages.”

      Married couples can file MFS – Married Filing Single

      God gave us a wonderful roadmap, it‘s not His fault if we can’t figure out where to go.

      Report Post »  
  • Disabledvet
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:52am

    I am in the 4 that say it does not work , I caught my first wife cheating on me when I came home early from a military mission, my second wife I caught smoking dope, and I will honestly say I will never marry again, I have a woman that stops by and might stay a day or two but then she knows she needs to go home. I will keep my dog I trust him.

    Report Post »  
    • NoName22
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:18pm

      Nothing wrong with smoking dope, rather my girl smokes than drinks.

      But a little humor for you……..Lock your girlfriend/wife in a trunk and lock your dog in a trunk for 15 minutes and come back…….Take a guess who will be happy to see you.

      Report Post »  
    • SaintMichael
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:50pm

      Smoking weed is a serious problem for a *military* spouse.

      Report Post »  
    • wilted6orchid
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 2:58pm

      Disabled Vet,
      Your post is heartbreaking. Perhaps you should better say that you don’t trust your own tastes in women. I am an ARMY brat that grew up on overseas bases, and later married a military man. Our lifestyle is not easy in anyway. Everyone handles those pressures differently. But, all women are not like the few you have been with. You know that. When my husband deployed my every waking thought was of him or of our children, trying to adjust to being without their daddy. I know many, many military spouses that are faithfully counting down the minutes til you guys fly in. I have friends that group together to encourage each others families while the sponsor is deployed. Many of those couple have been happily married for 10-20 years. Thank you so much for your service. And I am very sorry it cost you so much.

      Report Post »  
    • Disabledvet
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 3:28pm

      I have heard your joke, but it was if your wife is screaming let me in at the front door and your dog is barking to get in at the back door who do you let in first, the dog because it will shut up when it comes in.,

      I don’t doubt that there are many women that wait faithfully for someone to return from a mission, and for those i am happy, even though I am retired now I won’t trust another wife, and yes a wife that gets caught smoking dope and married to a military person can just as quick ruin the military persons Job, they take the actions of your spouse out on the military person, I personally don’t care if people I know smoke that crap or not, just don’t bring it around me and we can stay friends.

      Report Post »  
  • Morningcrapper
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:49am

    Once again the voice of a few trump the voices of many……………..

    Report Post »  
  • Diamondback
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:49am

    The destruction of the institutions of marriage and morality are key components in the Communist Strategy.

    Report Post »  
  • rogue operator
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:43am

    The family is a major obstacle to utopian collectivism, and therefore the left believes the family must be broken up. When a person shows particular emotions towards other particular individuals, it presents a barrier to those in the state, who often use abstract ideas such as “sacrifice for the common good” to promote their policies. It appears that the left’s efforts to demoralize the institution of marriage, to apply economic pressure on it through dollar devaluation and welfare are showing a lot of signs of success.

    Report Post » rogue operator  
  • NoName22
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:30am

    Same sex couples that want to adopt kids and raise a family……no bother by me. Oddly enough, homosexual homebuyers are known to raise property values, so it sounds like they have extra money and there’s plenty of children who need homes.

    As for the 18-30 age group who has a more broad definition………their parents are the ones who started getting more divorces and remarrying, so don’t get mad at the people in my age group.

    Couples who live together but don’t get married, hey that’s your choice, typically the result of financial woes and unemployment worries, again, your choice, I’ve no problem with it.

    People who don’t view marriage as a religious thing, but just the joining of a man and a woman, hey your views, I don’t care, your views your life.

    But those who do get married and TRULY understand what those vows mean…..Financial woes and unemployment will be an issue, but not the deciding issue. Your serve God or Mammon? Love ain’t no hunky dory happy go lucky thing. You know your in love when that person is by your side, THROUGH THE WORST. And that is what marriage means. People think love is this whimsical amazing grace filled happy bubble. WAKE UP BABY, true love is for better AND FOR WORSE.

    Report Post »  
  • seanpatriot
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:28am

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    stupid libs

    Report Post » seanpatriot  
    • MrButcher
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:03pm

      you already used that one.

      if you‘re gonna post these damn things at least keep ’em fresh and new.

      Report Post » MrButcher  
  • MrButcher
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:26am

    If we let gays marry that percentage would go down to 1 out of 10 thinking it obsolete.

    Report Post » MrButcher  
    • NoName22
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:35am

      Look, I’m all for gay unions. If two people want to commit their lives to each other, they deserve that recognition from the GOVERNMENT. They deserve the tax breaks and the right to say who comes to their hospital room and all the rights that come with married couples.
      However, the church should not have to change it’s definition, nor should the word marriage, which was not originally defined by our government, be subject to change by the government.
      Government has no power defining what marriage is, they only have the power of recognizing the tax breaks and laws that are applied to couples legally married under law, not under the church, mosque, synagogue, etc.
      If you want to say that’s bull, then polygamy should be allowed as well.

      Report Post »  
    • Slevdog1
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:48am

      Absolutely, civil unions are fine, yet marriage is spiritual and religious. Gay marriage, or anything to deal with marriage, is one man and one woman.

      Report Post »  
    • MrButcher
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:56am

      oh, i agree. churches can do whatever they want.

      But as long as the government is involved in recognizing marital unions, same-sex partners need to also be recognized. Why is this a bridge too far for so many?

      Churches don’t actually issue marriage licenses. They just conduct the ceremony and provide a venue. County clerks are the ones who issue the certificates.

      I don’t see what the big deal is.

      Supporting gay marriage doesn’t mean you have to have one.

      Report Post » MrButcher  
    • NoName22
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:17pm

      @MrButcher

      The deal is the gay community wants it to be called marriage. That’s the issue. Government has no power defining the word marriage, that word and it’s definition precede the Constitution.

       
    • gramma b
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:50pm

      Sex and sexual attraction have an obvious biological purpose. The urge to imitate intercourse with a person lacking the correct anatomical equipment is an obvious dysfunction. It is as if a person had an irresistible urge to “eat” by stuffing his food in his ear. There is no reason why society should dignify this deviant imitation of reproductive activity by letting people imitate marriage. It is letting the inmates take over the asylum.

      And, that’s aside from the moral considerations. The acceptance of gay “marriage” and homosexual behavior is part of the deliberate destruction of Judeo-Christian morality. Google “cultural marxism,” and read.

      Report Post »  
  • capitalismrocks
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:20am

    I see too many frazzles mothers trying to handle a child or more then one child. Fathers that have a child alone trying to work and bring up their children also having a tough time of it…

    Children, if you see them, speak with them, when they are from a divorced/separated family have a very tough time of it for the first couple of years and this generally reflects in their classwork/homework, they tend to become reclusive or lash out emotionally…

    A healthy two parent family unit is a much better formula for all persons in the family so perhaps people may say that Marriage and family are obsolete, it may all sound good on a sterile piece of paper, but in the realworld where emotions, time, schedules, attention, and such all factor in, it doesn’t work.

    Report Post » capitalismrocks  
  • Krisie
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:20am

    I hate to say that it is life imitating T.V. and lack of Church, and lack of all that is good and decent taught within America. I personally am divorced once and then remarried. I have now been married for going on 15 years, and my son who is 18 resides with myself and my husband. I think that it is sad that family and marriage has been made insignificant. For in my mind it is very significant..

    Report Post » Krisie  
    • bookofwisdom
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 2:37pm

      I agree with you Krisie. They have tried to take God out of everything and that is where America will fall. As far as life imitating TV, well, if we still had God, we would have moral values and it would be reflected in TV as well as real life, but it is hard to find young people who respect their elders must less even know what morals are. It is what children are being taught at home that counts and that should include clean living, morals and God. Just my thoughts. May God Bless.

      Report Post » bookofwisdom  
  • SueDinNY
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:19am

    When families start to fall apart, that’s the end of a moral civilization. Just fact. It doesn’t work. We see it happening more and more – single women raising children by themselves, on welfare or living with their parent(s). Where are the men, boys? Males are beginning to fail here. They drop out of school, sit around the house, deal drugs, have children and don’t have anything to do with them. Society going down the tubes.

    Report Post »  
    • untameable-kate
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:43am

      Hey now, don’t come down too hard on us single moms. I’m one of the ones who had a miscreant boyfriend who left at the words “maybe baby” and have been on my own ever since. when my child was two I put a down payment on a house, ten days after we moved into our brand new house I got laid off. I couldn’t find a job so I started my own small business and it has thrived. My child is thirteen, my business thrives and I have NEVER taken a handout or lived with my parents because of my decision to be a single mom. So, you see, we are not all the pariah society makes us out to be.

      Report Post » Untameable-kate  
    • Soldiers_Son
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:40pm

      Single parents are not the problem, it is the society that tries to push people to think that it is the best way and somehow ideal. It is the society that tries to tell women that they should raise their kids alone because they don’t need a man. It is the society that raises boys to become sperm donors who have no sense or responsibility. It is a society that teaches that a woman‘s choice doesn’t start until AFTER she is already pregnant. It is a society that would rather give hand outs instead of hand ups.

      Single parents are not the problem. The problem is when our society starts to think that it is the norm and the family is abolished and all kids are owned by the state to be raised as pawns and useful idiots.

      Report Post »  
    • teahugger
      Posted on November 20, 2010 at 8:24am

      Sue: I have to agree with you. As individuals, single parents and co-habitating couples can have fulfilling lives, and everyone has different and often extenuating circumstances…but it is not good for society as a whole. History has proven this time and again.

      Report Post » teahugger  
  • BetterDays
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:18am

    Saul Alyinki must be so proud, Oh yea he‘s dead and doesn’t hear, think, feel or even dream, He’s just dead. Now my marraige on the other hand is alive and thriving, and getting prepared for the difficult times ahead. Difficult times , not within my marriage, but in what our nations faces in terms of food, clothing , and sheltering needs.

    Report Post »  
  • GhostOfJefferson
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:18am

    Communist Agenda appears to be progressing as planned. >:-(

    Report Post » GhostOfJefferson  
  • Lessa Stone
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:18am

    Marriage is a government money maker. You pay when you get married, and if your marriage is unbearable you pay beyond belief when you try to get free. I think marriage should be a choice made between two people, in a church, temple or other religious organization. Marriage should be a spiritual rather than legally binding contract, if it needs to end, a religious mediator can help couples divide the property. Wishful thinking on my part, divorce lawyers will never give up their Mercedes.

    Report Post »  
    • HillBillySam1
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:28am

      It’s a good thing that the polling did not occur in these here parts of the country since a great majority of the weddings performed are done so with the barrel of a shotgun placed firmly twixt the shoulder blades of the groom……certainly not the time or place to discuss the merits of a contemporary marriage arrangement.

      Report Post »  
  • untameable-kate
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:16am

    I wonder if that number is equal to the number of people that say they have no religion. Marraige is after all a religious institution.

    I am glad they will start classifying people who live together a family, now a family will not be considered a single income household for govt hand out purposes when there may be income coming into the home from a live-in companion.

    Report Post » Untameable-kate  
  • HillBillySam1
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:14am

    “Whom God hath joined together, let NO man tear it asunder.”

    Report Post »  
  • snowleopard3200 {mix art}
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:12am

    4 in 10 say marriage is becoming obselete. Well that still leaves 6 in 10 that get it!!!

    http://www.artinphoenix.com/gallery/grimm

    Report Post » Snowleopard {gallery of cat folks}  
    • Craigly
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 2:28pm

      I get it but, unfortunately, my wife doesn’t. We are to be separated soon. I nor my two boys want it to be that way. I need prayers from any Christian that reads this message please. Pray that my wife be lifted up to Christ and that she know and understand the truth. We love her. Thanks and God Bless.

      Report Post » Craigly  
    • wonderbug
      Posted on November 20, 2010 at 8:37am

      Craigly, prayers for your wife. I hope you can refuse, and that her heart comes around.

      Report Post »  
  • JohnEightOne2Ten
    Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:10am

    I don’t buy it and remember, that apparently 6 out of 10 say marriage is not obsolete. Funny how they report that the glass is 40% empty instead of 60% full in the liberal media’s ongoing attempt to paint things their way. The 4 out of 10 either want marriage to be obsolete so as to support their polygamous lifestyle and/or as a defense of their bad choices in a mate or maybe their inability to stick with a commitment. Most (not all) social difficulties that we face today can be traced or attributed to the breakdown of traditional family values and traditional marriage and family life. Sorry, that is just the way I see it.

    Report Post »  
    • Beckofile
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 11:26am

      Look at where most of the folks learn and study…Public indocrination stations.

      Report Post » Beckofile  
    • tobywil2
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:16pm

      If marriage is obsolete. Why does the gay community demand the right to participate in it?

      Personally, I am 77 years old and have been married for 53 years. If marriage is determined to be obsolete will that dissolve my marriage of 53 years? If so, will either my wife or I have to move out of our home?

      Could this just be more irrelevant crap to cover Obama’s footprints?
      http://commonsense21c.com/

      Report Post » tobywil2  
    • Soldiers_Son
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:31pm

      The “enemy” knows that the family is the strongest unit, will provide the most powerful backlash to their plans, and people will fight to the death to protect and preserve it. The institution of the family makes control much harder because people will cling to their own kin and will fight to protect them from what they view as a threat (as it should be).

      By breaking up the family they can control people easier. A broken family creates a void in people that they try and fill in other ways, and the government is aways happy to step in and fill that void with their perversions. It is a divide and conquer technique that is very effective in destroying the human spirit (why do you think the Nazis split families up when they were sending them to concentration camps?)

      And finally, the family is an institution of God. The enemy is out to destroy anything of God, and so they attack the institution of the family to try and destroy God.

      God, Family and Freedom. Let us stand for what is good and right.

      Report Post »  
    • Peters
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:38pm

      These observations are but a momentary snap shot of our lives, of our generations, of human history. This data, it’s only a flash of history in our struggles with the infamous “human condition.” In that, there are to be no conclusions to be made from this data; it’s no different than trying to call a football game at halftime because one team is winning.

      We are a world moving through time marked by symbiotic rhythms and beats, harmonies and crescendos of great and small tragedies, and the triumphs of evolution. Simply, we learn from our experiences and from those around us; and as higher thinking beings, we make adjustments in our thinking and in our actions based upon our experiences unlike any other species. This holds consistent with a society’s view on the rituals of mating and cohabitating . . . forming communities, villages, towns and cities . . . And unique to our species, we do it all in the quest of not only survival but obtaining upward mobility.

      As a society, we are making adjustments in our notions of marriage based upon our individual experiences; collectively, we are evolving, or rather we are reacting to the deck of cards that we have each been dealt or have made for ourselves and our children. In a most empathetic way then, attempt for moment to place your self in an innocent child’s mind that has the benefits of only one parent. It would be a natural tendency based upon the history of human behavior that this child would long for the elements that the dual parent model provides simply to obtain the benefits that they’re missing from only having a single parent or surrogate parent.

      The human psyche is evolving. Collectively, as a society, we are constantly evolving. In other words, let’s be patient here . . . God works in mysterious ways . . . right? How else do we explain Barack Obama? Nancy Pelosi . . . Harry Reid . . ? Sarah Palin, Paul Ryan, and Jim DeMint . . . ?

      Be patient . . . God is with us; and whether you believe that or not, you’re welcome to come along and evolve with us.

      Report Post »  
    • Highland
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 12:59pm

      God is not amused.

      Report Post » Highland  
    • ClockKing
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 1:23pm

      The human psyche is not evolving. We are the same as we were almost 5000 years ago. Only our arrogance (teenager or child-like in its nature) leads us to believe that we are so, evolved. The death of marriage? Look at the Black community, that is America’s future. Stuck in a ever present now you can never fully escape. Unable to even discuss the future.

      Report Post » ClockKing  
    • walkwithme1966
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 4:52pm

      Well, the is a very sad commentary on our supposedly Christian nation!! Wonder what our Founding Fathers would think of this? http://wp.me/pYLB7-m2

      Report Post » walkwithme1966  
    • T.JeffersonWasTheBest
      Posted on November 18, 2010 at 9:18pm

      The Wheat and The Tares are growing more distinct. Harvest time getting closer?

      Report Post » T.JeffersonWasTheBest  
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