Media

No Phone, Internet or TV: Mom Unplugs Teens for 6 Months

NEW YORK (AP) — Susan Maushart lived out every parent’s fantasy: She unplugged her teenagers.

For six months, she took away the Internet, TV, iPods, cell phones and video games. The eerie glow of screens stopped lighting up the family room. Electronic devices no longer chirped through the night like “evil crickets.” And she stopped carrying her iPhone into the bathroom.

The result of what she grandly calls “The Experiment” was more OMG than LOL — and nothing less than an immersion in RL (real life).No Phone, Internet or TV: Mom Unplugs Teens for 6 Months

As Maushart explains in a book released in the U.S. this week called “The Winter of Our Disconnect” (Penguin, $16.95), she and her kids rediscovered small pleasures — like board games, books, lazy Sundays, old photos, family meals and listening to music together instead of everyone plugging into their own iPods.

Her son Bill, a videogame and TV addict, filled his newfound spare time playing saxophone. “He swapped Grand Theft Auto for the Charlie Parker songbook,” Maushart wrote. Bill says The Experiment was merely a “trigger” and he would have found his way back to music eventually. Either way, he got so serious playing sax that when the gadget ban ended, he sold his game console and is now studying music in college.

Maushart’s eldest, Anni, was less wired and more bookish than the others, so her transition in and out of The Experiment was the least dramatic. Her friends thought the ban was “cool.” If she needed computers for schoolwork, she went to the library. Even now, she swears off Facebook from time to time, just for the heck of it.

Maushart’s youngest daughter, Sussy, had the hardest time going off the grid. Maushart had decided to allow use of the Internet, TV and other electronics outside the home, and Sussy immediately took that option, taking her laptop and moving in with her dad — Maushart’s ex-husband — for six weeks. Even after she returned to Maushart’s home, she spent hours on a landline phone as a substitute for texts and Facebook.

But the electronic deprivation had an impact anyway: Sussy’s grades improved substantially. Maushart wrote that her kids “awoke slowly from the state of cognitus interruptus that had characterized many of their waking hours to become more focused logical thinkers.”

Maushart decided to unplug the family because the kids — ages 14, 15 and 18 when she started The Experiment — didn’t just “use media,” as she put it. They “inhabited” media. “They don’t remember a time before e-mail, or instant messaging, or Google,” she wrote.

Like so many teens, they couldn’t do their homework without simultaneously listening to music, updating Facebook and trading instant messages. If they were amused, instead of laughing, they actually said “LOL” aloud. Her girls had become mere “accessories of their own social-networking profile, as if real life were simply a dress rehearsal (or more accurately, a photo op) for the next status update.”

Maushart admits to being as addicted as the kids. A native New Yorker, she was living in Perth, Australia, near her ex-husband, while medicating her homesickness with podcasts from National Public Radio and The New York Times online. Her biggest challenge during The Experiment was “relinquishing the ostrichlike delusion that burying my head in information and entertainment from home was just as good as actually being there.”

Maushart began The Experiment with a drastic measure: She turned off the electricity completely for a few weeks — candles instead of electric lights, no hot showers, food stored in a cooler of ice. When blackout boot camp ended, Maushart hoped the “electricity is awesome!” reaction would soften the kids’ transition to life without Google and cell phones.

It was a strategy that would have made Maushart’s muse, Henry David Thoreau, proud. She is a lifelong devotee of Thoreau’s classic book “Walden,” which chronicled Thoreau’s sojourn in solitude and self-sufficiency in a small cabin on a pond in the mid-1800s. “Simplify, simplify!” Thoreau admonished himself and his readers, a sentiment Maushart echoes throughout the book.

As a result of The Experiment, Maushart made a major change in her own life. In December, she moved from Australia to Long Island in New York, with Sussy. Of course, the move merely perpetuated Maushart’s need to live in two places at once: She kept her job as a columnist for an Australian newspaper and is “living on Skype” because her older children stayed Down Under to attend university. Ironically, the Internet eased the transition to America for Sussy, who used Facebook to befriend kids in her new high school before arriving.

Another change for Maushart: She‘s no longer reluctant to impose blackouts on Sussy’s screentime. “Instead of angsting, ‘Don’t you think you’re spending too much time on the computer? Don’t you think you should do something else like reading?‘ I now just take the computer away when I think she’s had enough,” Maushart said in a phone interview. “And now that she‘s been on the other side and remembers what it’s like, it’s less of an issue.”

Maushart realizes that living off the grid for six months is unrealistic for most people. (She also admits getting her kids to go along with it partly by bribing them with a cut of proceeds from the book, which she planned to write all along.)

But she encourages families to unplug periodically. “One way to do it is just to have that one screen-free day a week. Not as a punishment — not by saying, ‘I’ve had enough!’ — but by instituting it as a special thing,” she said. “There isn‘t a kid on the planet who wouldn’t really rather be playing a board game than sitting at the computer.”

Comments (54)

1 2
  • JCoolman
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 9:29am

    After reading a lot of the posts, I must be one of a kind. None of my kids have even been plugged in yet. And as far as I’m concerned that wont happen until they are on their own.

    Report Post »  
  • cranberry
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 9:19am

    This wouldn’t work in most homes, the adults need their tv, never mind the kids! This mom is good!

    Report Post » cranberry  
  • dizzyinthedark
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 9:10am

    We did this for almost 7 years as we circumnavigated aboard our sailboat while homeschooling our children. They learned to ‘think for themselves’–wonder that! We were ahead of the ballgame with education, recycling, etc. Unfortunately, here we are with America in the biggest mess and this woman‘s experiment will probably become a reality for everyone’s daily living!

    By the way of the 33 countries we visited, there still is no country like America! We didn’t have to return, but we knew there is no place better. We need to pick ourselves up by the boot straps, remember we outnumber the Progressives, we know their tactics and won’t fall for them anymore (we too were asleep like most) we will step over or around the Progressives from now on.

    Nothing wrong at all in getting back to a simple lifestyle. One finds out more about themselves because they are not distracted. Hey, you might find that ‘inner peace’ you know–God!

    Report Post » dizzyinthedark  
    • Catherine A.
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 8:30pm

      Ditto, Dizzy! I think you’re the only person on this thread who has made the connection with the spiritual. The WORST part of being addicted to electronics is that it separates us from God. He gets lost in all the noise.

      Report Post » Catherine A.  
  • poofster
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 5:40am

    this is awesome. i keep trying to get my parents to do a digital detox type thing. i hate the tv on all the time just to have it on and they are notorious for that.

    Report Post »  
  • SND97
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 5:17am

    Some idiot liberal Judge will just rule she is breaking the law or blocking the rights of her kids to have accsess. Watch and see if a lawsuit isn’t filed by the ACLU

    Report Post »  
  • Diane TX
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 3:46am

    It annoys me to no end that my adult son and daughter-in-law are forever on their I-phones. Whatever is happening on the I-phones, always takes precedent over the real life that’s happening in front of them. It wouldn’t be a surprise to anyone that I refuse to own an I-phone. I have a cell phone, but I actually use it for phone calls! How weird of me.

    Report Post »  
    • The Noodle Fish
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 4:00am

      so it annoys you that technology is always advancing and leaving the old outdated methods of communication behind? People invented iPhones (if you’re going to insult a gadget, at least refer to it by its proper name) because they were useful and made many people’s lives better. If they’re not right for you, then don’t use them. Just don’t complain that others use them and love them.

      Report Post » The Noodle Fish  
    • Catherine A.
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 8:27pm

      Noodlefish, read more carefully. I don’t think Diane is complaining about the iPhones per se, but the fact her kids are “on them” all the time — and ignoring real life. I’ve quit inviting my sister over for dinner for this very reason; she spends the whole meal checking and responding to her phone. The damn thing goes off every time she gets an email, a text, a Tweet, or a Facebook update. She has a Bluetooth earpiece constantly stuck in her ear (I‘m not sure she doesn’t go to bed with it). It’s unbelievably rude and narcissistic.

      Report Post » Catherine A.  
  • jbl8199
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 2:53am

    I don’t know, this just seemed a little extreme to me. 6 months is a bit much. I could see doing this for a month or two, but not 6. That’s a little too harsh.

    Report Post » jbl8199  
    • Old Truckers
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 3:50pm

      Six months would be hard to do, but I think if it could be endured, by month two, everyone would be able to see the benefit and get used to it and even appreciate the peace in the family circle.
      After six months there would be no going back.

      Report Post » Old Truckers  
  • Workforit
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 2:00am

    I used to confiscate my kids play station a week at a time… Then play it in front of him or at night just after his bed time. He used to get so mad, we had the big screen, sub woofers, I think the Medal of Honor Series? was the coolest games ever invented. I had to give the thing back to him at the end of the week or I would have gotten addicted! I won’t even play games now, too addictive for me.

    My son is now 21 and turned out fine, same with the girl child, I’m proud of both kids. They will tell you we’ve had our moments…and we did, Especially when I shut down their cell phones… The play station was nothing!

    Report Post »  
  • the hawk
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 12:30am

    MYson‘s Xbox would be in the river if he did’nt have straight A’s , plays football and soccer !

    Report Post »  
    • The Noodle Fish
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 4:14am

      But… football is crap. Xbox is not. Grades and Soccer I must agree with you on.

      Report Post » The Noodle Fish  
  • HillKid8
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 12:24am

    When My kids were teens, if they got to out of hand or broke house hold rules, I would punish them by turning off the power to the rooms upstairs. I would gather them all together and start to sing the theme song to Gilligan’s Island, and they would know what was coming. Innocents were caught up in the punishment some times, but it caused a great deal of pressure for everyone to remain within the bounds of rules we set. Now that my kids are grown and have kids of their own, they say they will do the same. Sure beats yelling!

    Report Post »  
  • Drygao
    Posted on January 20, 2011 at 12:13am

    Watchout, this will lead to friend of the environment awards and carbon footprint talk.

    Report Post » Drygao  
  • valarie
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 11:22pm

    Oh…My…God….ROTFLMFAO! This hag is ONLY into this for the book and media money. She is lying through her teeth. What a moron.

    valarie  
  • valarie
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 11:17pm

    She lost me at NPR. Who would listen to that garbage? Also, doesn’t this seem a bit sinister, given the timing, when all the libs want to do is shut down the common-sense, middle-of-the-road media? Sorry…just sayin’.

    If someone had suggested this a few years ago, before this psychotic conglomerate of an adminstration glommed on to our America (not for long), I would have said “YES!” I would have thought it was a great idea. I’m just being a little cautious

    Report Post » valarie  
    • wesleyapril
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 1:29pm

      I think it is a great idea – really – on one hand. But would you prefer to get your news from a liberal rag that isn’t even worth the paper it is printed on? I am going to have to agree with Valarie – on this one. Maybe taking away the privileges of the internet, and tv- and games – but I wouldn’t take them permanently. And come on – if the kid wanted to go on the computer – they went to the library – so they were still connected.

      Report Post »  
  • AzDebi
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 11:01pm

    What a great story!

    Report Post » AzDebi  
  • TotallyBelievableGuy
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:42pm

    She should’ve gone farther.

    “here’s knife, there’s the woods.”

    Report Post » TotallyBelievableGuy  
  • TurnRight
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:33pm

    “Never underestimate the power of influence for good especially in the lives of our children”
    -Dieter Uchtdorf-

    Report Post »  
  • BOUGHT YOUR SILO YET?
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:32pm

    This is an interesting story. I have done something similar in the past with my kids- only it was called disconnect to reconnect. Right after my husband was laid off in Dec. 08″ I decided to find ways to cut our spending. One way was our electric bill. So, I decided that every Sunday we would not use any electricity or electric products all day. The only things we kept running was the heater and refrigerator. Saturday night I would unplug EVERYTHING in the house. I also put tape over all the light switches so we would not accidentally turn them on. We used oil lamps and candles at night, and just opened the blinds and drapes during the day. Meals were kept lite. Whatever could be prepared on the grill or eaten cold. Entertainment- we told stories, read books, played board games, and did puzzles. As with this story, it was an experiment. One- to see how much we would miss our electronic devices and two to see if not using any electricity for 4 days out of the month would save us any money. We did see our electric bill go down- noting it would have been less had we gone without heat and our refrigerator. But, the kids really enjoyed this time together as a family- so much so they would look forward to it the rest of the week. I highly recommend some sort of electronic or technological disconnect for any family wanting to teach a valuable lesson to their kids.

    Report Post » BOUGHT YOUR SILO YET?  
    • Sondergard
      Posted on January 19, 2011 at 11:19pm

      anyone else shocked the left has not called it child abuse or inhumane treatment

      Report Post »  
    • Dustyluv
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 7:23am

      Yea…let her spank her kids and CPS will be at her door.

      Report Post »  
  • Grandpa's Attic
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:14pm

    Great job Susan….I feel, we all need to back away time to time. I recently started to do more puzzles, read more books. At first I had to force myself to do this and was actually pretty tough to rip myself away. I added up how much time I sat in front of a computer or TV a day and added up to about 10 hours a day. I said this can not be healthy, even if I did work out (while watching TV) So I took a few hours off each day from tube, Computer, and game consoles. But as I began to do this I found that it was quite nice and more relaxing to escape, not to the electronics, but to simply escape from the electronics.

    Report Post »  
  • BoilitDown
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:12pm

    Do you know whatt the awful thing is about this story?
    It’s the fact that it seems so remarkable that there is an honest to God good parent that warrants a story about good parenting. It seems to be so far out of the ordinary these days.

    Report Post »  
  • RogueAmeritarian
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:35pm

    WOW, I wish I had the jewels to do that, my kids would hang me within the week. It is a shame that we have come to this as a society, but……my hat is off to this lady Susan!

    Report Post » Reduce.Our.Govt.Footprint  
    • Shane the Golden
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 9:37am

      Who’s the parent????

      Report Post » Shane the Golden  
    • Echelon
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 9:56am

      And who’s in charge – you or the kids? I took away my daughters iPad, iPod and Internet for the past two months, and her grades went from a D to a B. My son is restricted playing video games to one hour a day and now he‘s getting A’s. Seriously considering disconnecting the TV next.

      Report Post » Echelon  
    • GrannyATL
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 11:57am

      Wait….wait….wait! You don‘t have to completely eliminate the kids’ access to everything electronic for long stretches of time. There is a lot to be said for taking ONE night a week and making it a fun evening that revolves around playing fun games by candle light. If your kids are already well into their teens, it may be too late, but get creative here, parents!

      We parents start it. When they’re toddlers, we plug them into Sesame Street indoors and a video when they’re in the car. We let them have age-appropriate versions of video games from the time they can begin to talk and then wonder why they disconnect from others. We’ve trained them to be quiet and leave us alone so we can do our own thing on our BlackBerries or iPhones.

      There is going to be a huge backlash to us as a society because we’ve stopped teaching our children how to interact and work out differences with others. Rather than listen to kids screaming from the back seat of the car, we turn on a video. As they grow older, kids don’t realize that being given all this “me” time has prevented them from learning how to work out normal differences we find in any community; be it family or classroom or ball team. They are easily agitated because they’ve never learned the coping skills that came through trial and error in working things out with others.

      Taking away the toys one night a week is a great start to helping the family regain some ground that’s been lost these last 20 years.

      Report Post » GrannyATL  
  • workin4alivin
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:17pm

    good for her and her kids didn’t stop living.

    Report Post » workin4alivin  
  • RobertCA
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:16pm

    I agree with her , why not .

    Report Post » Robert-CA  
    • GrannyATL
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 11:46am

      A lady after my own heart! My ex-husband had to have a TV in every room. I hated it, so when we separated in 1991 I wanted to wean my kids from the Boob Tube. Every Monday night became “Candle Night” where we turned off all lights after dinner was cleaned up. I made popcorn and snacks and then the kids scurried all over the house to make sure it was completely dark. (Ages were 14, 11 and 10.)

      We played board games by candle light. We learned new card games. We played Hide-and-Seek. One evening my kids actually thought it was hilarious to show off their Boy Scout knot-tying prowess by tying me up and then hiding. Our spontaneous fun and hillarious laughing fits were worth so much more than a TV show.

      My children are now adults and we STILL laugh about the fun we had on Candle Nights.

      Report Post » GrannyATL  
  • grandmaof5
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:13pm

    We did something similar to our kids years ago (no high tech back then) – it was TV unplugged. It was the most peaceful time of our parenthood – no fighting, stayed outside for hours, read…..highly suggest that to all parents.

    Report Post »  
    • RobertCA
      Posted on January 19, 2011 at 10:05pm

      Same thing with my cousin , kids refused to sit & eat dinner cause they never wanted to leave the TV , so my cousin took the TV out to the sidewalk & left it there , 15 minutes later TV is gone . He bought another TV after 4 month .

      Report Post » Robert-CA  
    • Showtime
      Posted on January 19, 2011 at 11:32pm

      Grandmaof5, we also got “unplugged” when the TV went off. (Not “one of the TVs,” THE TV!)

      Report Post » Showtime  
  • Robbedagain
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:13pm

    The kids will never make it, they’ll die after 2 months. ha ha

    Report Post »  
  • orcainohio
    Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:10pm

    imagin that a parent taking control of their own household

    Report Post »  
    • M 4 Colt
      Posted on January 19, 2011 at 9:43pm

      Kids need to know that there is MORE TO LIFE then just cell phone and computers!!!
      This is just what kids need a mother or father
      who cares enough to get involved in their life and say no
      .
      It may not seem like it right at the time when you limit
      your kids but
      believe me they will respect you for it later on

      Report Post »  
    • click4cheapandeasyweb
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 12:10am

      Two thumbs up for Susan Maushart!

      Report Post »  
    • The Noodle Fish
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 3:57am

      Well it’s obviously her right, and I have all due respect for not worrying about her (spoiled) daughter’s feelings, but I feel the same way about that teacher who broke the students cell phone in class: have a little respect for technology.. human entrepreneurs spent years; generations; working on those very same technologies. Although I‘m sure they didn’t want some idiotic teens prowling around questionable content, people should have some sort of reverence for technological advancement

      Report Post » The Noodle Fish  
    • JESUS-IS-LORD
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 11:06am

      Yay! Congratulations. God would be so proud of you. Parents take control of your children. Stop letting them walk all over you. Exercise authority and read the Bible. Praise be to God. Amen.

      Report Post » JESUS-IS-LORD  
    • AngryMobOfOne
      Posted on January 20, 2011 at 2:29pm

      Obviously a Lib, wonder if she’s aware of these “optics” (yes I’m learning to speak Lib)?

      “…[Giving up] podcasts from National Public Radio and The New York Times online.” = “…relinquishing the ostrichlike delusion…”

      oops, lil’ bit of truth slipped out

      Report Post »  
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