User Profile: StraightDave

Member Since: March 03, 2012


  • September 22, 2013 at 10:56am

    Who cares? Every song from this band sounds the same.

  • August 14, 2013 at 6:33pm

    I have an interesting story:

    When my brother passed away, his daughter was only three years old. One night after his death the mother of his child heard the little girl laughing and talking. The next morning mom asked her what was so funny and the little girl replied,”daddy came to visit and this time daddy brought Jesus.” Mom asked what Jesus looked like and the little girl said she couldn’t see Jesus’ face because he was so bright but she knew it was Jesus because of his eyes.
    On a second occasion, my brother’s daughter was laughing in the backseat of her mom’s car. Mom asked her what was so funny and the little girl said “dad is being silly.” Mom asked her daughter if they should stop and let daddy in the car so he could drive home with them to their house. The three year old girl said. “daddy doesn’t have to drive in cars anymore.” Mom asked, “why not?” My brother’s daughter replied,”because daddy has wings.”

    This little girl had no Christian influence in her life at that time.

    Responses (1) +
  • August 13, 2013 at 10:20pm

    My daughter needed two forms of ID to register for the second grade but I don’t need an ID to vote for the POTUS. WTF?

  • August 2, 2013 at 3:51pm

    **** are useless creatures.

    Responses (1) +
  • August 1, 2013 at 10:32pm

    Chicago State University Education Stats

    Overall % Graduation 16%
    Retention Rate 55%
    Graduation Rate 16%

    Chicago State University Admission Stats

    Overall Percent Admitted 57%
    Percent Men Admitted 56%
    Percent Women Admitted 57%
    Total Number of Applicants 6810
    SAT 75th Percentile (Math) Unknown
    SAT 75th Percentile (Critical Reading) Unknown
    SAT 75th Percentile (Writing) Unknown
    ACT 75th Percentile 18
    Percent of Undergrad Enrollment Over Age 25 0.40%

    This is where she went to school.

  • May 10, 2013 at 9:06pm

    How do we know global warming isn’t good for the earth? Maybe this is mother nature’s plan.

  • May 10, 2013 at 8:54am

    The teacher is your typical lazy black teacher. We get the same complaints in my district and every complaint has a common theme: black teacher. Sorry, just the way it is.

    Responses (2) +
  • October 31, 2012 at 11:08pm

    Maybe Harry Reid had one of those four hour boners?

  • October 29, 2012 at 4:14pm

    Future member of the DNC.

  • October 17, 2012 at 4:08pm

    Prices up at the store just like the cost of college tuition. Any time the government is willing to hand out free cash the market will take advantage of the situation.

  • September 22, 2012 at 12:20am

    I want to be there when God bitch slaps this piece of ****.

    Responses (2) +
  • September 18, 2012 at 12:45am

    Now, now. No need to stereotype because he shaves his head and has a goatee,

  • September 2, 2012 at 10:47pm

    G-loc out of the break. Pilot was “out” when he hit the ground.

  • August 30, 2012 at 4:19pm

    I don’t know what was more bizarre: posting signs like that or finding a sober black man to interview.

  • August 6, 2012 at 5:47pm

    Does the crowd have to chant “Kong” to get Serena out of the locker room?

  • August 1, 2012 at 9:04pm

    Burger joints could use the **** in their commercials like CFA uses cows: **** could hold up sign that reads “eat more meat.”

  • August 1, 2012 at 12:34am

    I think “blown yourself up” is an event in the 2016 games for all middle east countries. Gold medal goes to the one with the biggest blast radius of blood and guts.

  • July 20, 2012 at 11:24pm

    Maybe the top 400 or the 1% should stop paying taxes and get out to let the bottom feeders fend for themselves.

  • July 17, 2012 at 6:35pm

    Somewhere in Poland there is an oven with her name on it.

  • July 11, 2012 at 11:14pm

    What’s another trillion when the country is going down in flames.

    Responses (12) +