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Your Tax Dollars Paid To Learn That Cocaine Helps Rats Enjoy Miles Davis' Music (& More!)

Your Tax Dollars Paid To Learn That Cocaine Helps Rats Enjoy Miles Davis' Music (& More!)

Politicians always seem to be confused as to why their work is not appreciated. Could this have anything to do with the endless parade of stories about government incompetence and waste?

Let's review a few of the latest examples of elected officials throwing away taxpayer dollars in something we call "This Week in Government Waste":

  • It was just seven days ago that Glenn Beck reported on the $205,000 that was spent to "translocate" (definition: move) a single bush that was standing in the way of a $1.045 billion dollar, stimulus-funded highway construction project in California.

  • A bankruptcy court approved $368,500 in bonus payments to 20 Solyndra executives. Taxpayers are on the hook for a loan of $535 million, and the execs who took lead the company are getting bonuses after the place closed down.

All of those stories are enough to make you want to slap a "Ron Paul for President" sticker on your bumper and start screaming about shrinking the size of government. However, they pale in comparison to the story about a government funded study from 2011 that gave cocaine to rats and then tested their musical preferences.

Albany Medical College received two grants from the National Institute on Drug Abuse to play classical music and jazz music for rats and test their reactions. And then they gave the rats cocaine and repeated the test. Apparently the little drug addicts found Miles Davis' music more palatable when they were under the influence of coke.

The coked-up rat story was part of a list of 10 ridiculous studies on animals pointed out by a group that is against using animals in research called, In Defense of Animals (IDA).

The summaries of the studies that IDA is complaining about reads like a Letterman Top 10 list.

Top 10 Most Ridiculous Research on Animals for 2011

10) DRUG-INDUCED ARTHRITIS IN RATS MAKES EXERCISE HARDER

9) RATS WHO RUN AROUND MORE APPEAR TO BE MORE ANXIOUS

8) PRAIRIE VOLES STUDY SUGGESTS SINGLE MOMS RAISE LESS LOVING CHILDREN

7) DIETING HAMSTERS CHOOSE FOOD OVER SEX

6) RAT BITTER-TASTE NERVES APPEAR TO WORK

5) CONTAGIOUS YAWNING IN CHIMPANZEES IS EMPATHETIC

4) ALLIGATORS' SOUNDS AND ANATOMY DIFFER FROM HUMANS'

3) LEMON-FRESH SCENT CAN INDUCE ERECTIONS IN MONKEYS

2) RATS FIND MILES DAVIS IS BETTER WITH COCAINE

1) LABS ARE STRESSFUL PLACES FOR MONKEYS

Just reading each one of those titles inspires comedy that practically writes itself. And then you realize that all of us were asked to pay for these studies! Tax dollars were used to fund each and every single study on that list.

Again, recent polls about the performance of our elected officials does not bring good news for any incumbent:

Perhaps the people have caught on to the rampant waste, fraud, and abuse by many of those we have charged with spending our hard-earned money?

(H/T: NY Daily News - "Rats On Cocaine")

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