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Deep Fry His Head': Superstar TV Chef/Host Anthony Bourdain Has Sick Dick Cheney Fantasy Involving Waterboarding, Necrophilia and Cannibalism


"...then 'fu** him up the a**...'"

Editor's note: the following post contains graphic material. Discretion is advised.

Have you heard Anthony Bourdain's sick joke about Dick Cheney from over the weekend? Get ready.

The popular chef and TV host -- who famously feuds with fellow chef Paula Dean -- was at The Great GoogaMooga Festival in Brooklyn, NY, over the weekend and made quite the confession: not only would he totally try cannibalism, but he would most like to deep fry Dick Cheney after doing something quite sexual with him.

The Huffington Post (HuffPo) explains:

When someone later asked Bourdain which person he would most like to deep fry, he had a detailed idea. First, he would waterboard Dick Cheney. Then he would deep fry his head, f*ck him up the ass and then he'd cook him. Whoa.

Wow. While HuffPo didn't use quotes in the paraphrase, other outlets have. Take, for instance, Gothamist's retelling;

But Bourdain wasn't finished. When someone asked who he would most like to deep fry, he said it'd be Dick Cheney. First, he'd waterboard him, then "deep fry his head," then "[fu**] him up the ass." Uhh, we didn't see any Family Mooga tent yesterday that helped you explain to your children what "[fu**] him up the ass" means. [Redacted]

It should be noted that Bourdain's comments seem to have been said with plenty of sarcasm. For example, the only video of his talk so far features him blasting arch rival Dean. In that video -- which includes a profanity-laced tirade about Dean once criticizing him -- his remarks include plenty of snark (note also what looks like a cup of beer):

[content warning for graphic language]

And just in case things weren't weird enough, Bourdain also included instructions on cooking unicorn:

Perhaps the strangest -- and cutest -- part of the session was when a little girl asked Bourdain how he would cook a unicorn. He would roast the loin, grill the legs, braise the forequarter and use the horn to pick your teeth with after the meal. For the record, unicorn marrow is delicious, he says.

Yeah, there was plenty of sarcasm from the Libertarian-leaning host. But you know what they say: there's truth in jest.

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