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20 of the smartest (and/or snarkiest) lines from Dana Loesch's new book

"Let me be clear: A woman has the right to make a mess for the medic out of any attacker. It’s the occupational hazard of being a rapist: You may get shot by your victim. And rapists deserve it. A woman has the pro-choice right of self-defense."

Dana Loesch's new "Hands Off My Gun: Defeating the Plot to Disarm America" reads like a running Dana monologue, replete with history, heart, soul, smarts and a healthy dose of snark.

Building on some of the critical themes reflected in several books we have covered this year, from Katie Pavlich's "Assault and Flattery: The Truth About the Left and Their War on Women" (interview here) to Prof. Nicholas Johnson's "Negroes and the Gun: The Black Tradition of Arms" (more here) and Frank Miniter's "The Future of the Gun" (interview here), Dana makes an impassioned case for the Second Amendment as a civil if not natural right, and against those who seek to infringe upon and ultimately abolish it.

Dana Loesch confronts Moms Demand Action founder Shannon Watts April 26, 2014. (Photo: TheBlaze TV) Dana Loesch confronts Moms Demand Action founder Shannon Watts April 26, 2014. (Photo: TheBlaze TV) 

Below are 20 of the smartest and/or snarkiest quotes from Dana's new book. If you missed it, be sure to check out our exclusive excerpt from "Hands Off My Gun," and for more content like this, be sure to give Blaze Books a follow on Facebook, Twitter and Soundcloud.

1. "[B]itter clingers work in a community: They live in harmony with nature because they rely on nature to provide and sustain them. Hunting out of season or thinning a herd too much meant destabilization. Bitter clingers are conservationists, not environmentalists. They don't need bureaucrats in plush offices in Washington lecturing them about how to protect the land; the land is essential to their way of life."

2. "Maybe if abortions were done with so-called "assault weapons," progressives would finally be OK with firearms."

[sharequote align="center"]"Maybe if abortions were done with..."assault weapons," progressives would...be OK with firearms."[/sharequote]

3. "Liberals believe that our Second Amendment rights are what perpetuate horrific massacres like those at Sandy Hook and Columbine. They believe that if firearm ownership were illegal, then Adam Lanza wouldn’t have murdered anyone.

...Three Sandy Hooks take place every month in Chicago, the progressive model for gun control. Sometimes it seems like gun grabbers care a lot more about white children from Connecticut than black youth in inner-city Chicago."

4. "The first greatest lie ever told is that the devil doesn’t exist. The second greatest lie is any Democrat saying that they're for the Second Amendment."

Infamous Obama gun shot Image: Facebook (Image Source: Facebook) 

5. "The fact that the rifle is black means the bullets come out faster than if the rifle is pink, too. (Earlier we spoke about the racist roots of gun control, and apparently this extends to the guns themselves.) I once had someone tell me (in a swiftly deleted comment once mockery ensued) that the scope on a rifle was a grenade launcher. Watching anti-gun progressives try to describe firearms is exactly like watching a baby sit on the floor with a shape sorter and try to force the square shape through the round hole."

[instory-book ISBN="9781455584345"]

6. "Michael Bloomberg is using the "war on women" approach to destroy the Second Amendment. He needs the face of the Second Amendment to be a man's. It's hard to defeat a right but it’s a lot easier to defeat a right if you give it a face—or a sex. It's why he likes to have Shannon Troughton-Watts to be the face of his anti-gun campaign. Bloomberg figures that if he personifies Second Amendment supporters as big, burly men and anti–Second Amendment supporters as vulnerable mothers simply trying to protect their young, then he will finally find the support for gun control that has eluded him and other anti-gun advocates all of these years."

7. "My grandparents's gun cabinet was kept in their bedroom. Where I'm from, people don't have "safes," they have wooden cabinets with etched glass front doors, where instruments of protection and means to provide meat for your family take pride of place as display. Another way to look at it: It’s a fancy way to store metal middle fingers to Michael Bloomberg and the anti-gun lobby."

8. [On the view of progressives on Middle America] "We’re the bitter, bastard child of the coasts, and we use our guns, faith, and racism as Linus blankets to soothe our insecurities because, BUSH, obviously. We all sit around and eat corn from a shared tooth and every person, down to the babies, fashions their hair into a Kentucky Waterfall/Camaro crash helmet/mullet. Bitter isn’t the word I would use to describe the region in which I was born and raised. These people aren’t bitter, and President Obama doesn’t know the Midwest. He grew up the entitled grandson of a bank vice president with a well-educated, globe-trotting mother, and he attended private and Ivy League schools. He’s the first president I’ve seen ever pictured with an inability to properly shoulder a shotgun. He grew up in a city with the toughest anti-gun laws in the country (where only criminals have guns and the innocents have to pray that the police arrive before they bleed to death). The only church he’s ever attended is where an angry racist screamed about white America creating AIDS to kill black people. No wonder he has such a low opinion of middle America. No wonder he has such a low opinion of the Second Amendment. I don’t begrudge him or anyone a lack of experience or knowledge about firearms. I am, however, critical of these same people with their lack of experience and knowledge on the subject lecturing those of us with the experience and knowledge about this civil liberty."

9. "In essence, Michael Moore is OK with the nation’s school children having less protection than he has himself."

[sharequote align="center"]"Michael Moore is OK with the nation’s school children having less protection than he has himself."[/sharequote]

10. "These celebrities should practice the sermons they preach. Let them walk among the masses without any armed gunmen in sunglasses accompanying him. Let's see how they like it if they carried baseball bats or, to be even safer, butter knives. Maybe they could follow the University of Colorado’s rules on self-defense: urinate on themselves or vomit if they feel like they’re in danger. Let them play roulette with their family’s safety as they wait out the twenty-minute average response time to 911 while home invaders make their way to their children’s bedrooms. If it’s good enough for us, it’s good enough for them, right?"

11. "By focusing on only the violence and not the cases where self-defense saves lives (a statistic that greatly outweighs the illegal uses of firearms used in illegal acts) Bloomberg and his celebrity coterie are attempting to conflate peaceful, law-abiding exercise of the Second Amendment with tragedy. In 1995 a pre-DOJ Eric Holder appeared on C-SPAN2 to discuss the strategy of psychologically conditioning—brainwashing—people to turn on the Second Amendment. Said Holder: "What we need to do is change the way in which people think about guns, especially young people, and make it something that’s not cool, that it’s not acceptable, it’s not hip to carry a gun anymore, in the way in which we changed our attitudes about cigarettes." They’re the Joe Camels of gun control."

Eric Holder delivering a speech in which he talks about "brainwashing" people regarding (Image Source: YouTube screengrab/CSPAN) Eric Holder delivering a speech in 1995 in which he talks about "brainwashing" people regarding their beliefs on guns. (Image Source: YouTube screengrab/CSPAN)

12. "We can’t leave our civil liberties up to the state to determine. People against the death penalty routinely argue the state’s incompetency in determining who lives and dies. Yet the same people now argue that the state is competent enough to determine how someone else protects her own life and even stores her firearms."

[sharequote align="center"]"We can’t leave our civil liberties up to the state to determine."[/sharequote]

13. "Let me be clear: A woman has the right to make a mess for the medic out of any attacker. It’s the occupational hazard of being a rapist: You may get shot by your victim. And rapists deserve it. A woman has the pro-choice right of self-defense.

...These same women will eschew self-defense as "rape culture" but won’t identify sending dong pics, groping and assaulting female staff, or having a string of women accuse you of sexual assault (Weiner, Filner, Clinton, respectively) as "rape culture." The true intent is emerging: It isn’t just firearms for self-defense to which gun control lobbyists object, it’s really self-defense in any form. You don’t have the right to not be controlled."

14. "I'm especially amazed that feminists will preach countless tales advocating for the empowerment of women in almost all ways except for the one that matters most—protection of their physical safety. Throw a firearm into the equation, and modern-day feminists adopt the patriarchal prejudice represented by Colorado Democrats: Women suddenly become stupid, weak little creatures, unfit to carry a firearm."

15. "Here’s the dirty little secret about gun control: Everyone knows who white elitists like Dianne Feinstein, Elizabeth Warren, Rahm Emanuel, and Michael Bloomberg envision when they preach to Americans about keeping guns out of the hands of "criminals." Hint: They aren’t thinking about fresh-faced teenage girls in Omaha. No, they are thinking about "the scary black man" that they’ve seen on television during riots in Detroit or LA. It’s not a white man carrying a gun on a farm in Montana that scares them. Instead they talk about gun violence in "urban areas." And guess who lives there? Their racism is deep-seated, even if goes unnoticed by the mainstream press, even if they frequently tut-tut to conservatives about their intolerance and supposed racial insensitivity on just about every other issue. There is a cruel irony at the heart of all of this. As a result of such inherent and instinctive racism, the predominately white, patriarchal masters in Washington are actually making African-American kids less safe and more vulnerable to violence. The Wise White Men (and some Women) of Washington, D.C., are aiding and abetting race wars instead of stopping them. And they are doing so with tactics borrowed from the Ku Klux Klan—which wanted nothing more than to take guns away from black Americans."

U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) stands next to a display of assault weapons during a news conference January 24, 2013 on Capitol Hill in Washington, DC. (Image Source: Alex Wong/Getty Images) U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) stands next to a display of assault weapons during a news conference January 24, 2013 on Capitol Hill in Washington, DC. (Image Source: Alex Wong/Getty Images)

16. "Let’s face it. Liberals always have had a love-hate relationship with the Constitution—they love it when they can use it to abort babies or let gay people get married. They hate it when its language gets in the way of their big-government schemes, like censoring conservative media outlets or investigating troublesome, truth-telling journalists. They especially hate the fact that the Constitution explicitly—yes, explicitly—protects gun owners. To get around that inconvenient truth, the left does what it does best: It denies that things say what they actually say, or mean what they actually mean. Or as everyone’s favorite sexual harasser once famously put it, 'It depends on what the meaning of is is.'"

17. "If people like Chuck Schumer and Al Franken and Rahm Emanuel were in charge during colonial times, George Washington would have been captured, Adams and Jefferson hung, and today we’d all still be making out our annual taxes to the Chancellor of the Exchequer and exchanging currency on which the profiles of monarchs are minted."

18. "If you think Creed is a fabulous band and take no issue with Scott Stapp’s grunting constipation vocals, it doesn’t physically hurt me (much) to allow that viewpoint to stand uncontested. You loving Creed doesn’t seek to remove from me a civil liberty in a world where civil liberties are becoming few and far between. You owning all of Creed’s albums on both CD and MP3 isn’t infringing upon my rights. But you believing that a criminal may illegally and irresponsibly use a firearm against an innocent isn’t a good enough argument to render the innocent without a firearm as a means of defense. You believing that I and others should be disarmed, and you actively pushing for your opinion to become policy and trump a civil liberty, ceases to be a case of "agreeing to disagree." It is a threat. The first step in battling anti–Second Amendment rhetoric is to not cede the language or accept an illegitimate turn of phrase."

19. "I’ve come to regard Dianne Feinstein’s "assault weapons" press conferences in the same way. Every few years or so, Senator Feinstein calls a press conference, the D.C. version of theater, and plays Vanna White with guns strapped to whiteboards. You can watch her age through the years at these pressers via Google Images. She begins with a youthful plump to her cheeks, standing tall, holding up a rifle to her chest and as the years go by she takes on the posture of a cocktail shrimp and simply motions to the boards. I give her credit for her dedication to never learning a single thing about the firearms she proposes to ban. It takes a devotion to remain ignorant on a topic when you spend decades discussing it."

20. "No, Michael Bloomberg. The face of gun control isn’t a wealthy PR executive from Monsanto that you lured into fronting an extremist [hate] group against law-abiding moms. The faces of gun control are rapists. Drug dealers. Gang members. Car jackers. Muggers. Abusers. By working to disarm women—and men—you’re encouraging them."

One last thing…
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