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Dude, Benghazi is . . . so Yesterday.

Meet Lil' Tommy, twerp author of Benghazi “lying points.”

Courtesy of Author.

Once upon a time, there was a country of decent and hardworking people who trusted their elected politicians. Sometimes this turned out to be not-such-a-good idea.

Courtesy of Author. Courtesy of Author.

Case in point: when Prince Hope-n-Change (with his charming smile and adorable Dumbo ears) was elected to the presidency of his country. Accompanied by his lovely wife (who had just become proud of her country for the first time) he moved into our White House with his fellow travelers: radical-progressive-hoops shooting-hem kissers who constantly fed his Chicago-sized ego.

Prince Hope-n-Change’s minions knew that, to protect their cushy White House jobs, they would be required to protect the Prince and his job. No leadership failure was ever to be his fault . . . even when it was.

Then, a national tragedy occurred on Sept. 11, 2012. The American consulate in Libya was attacked by Al Qaeda affiliated terrorists. Four brave Americans were killed. Was this the fault of incompetency in the White House or the Department of State? No! It was nobody’s fault, it just happened.

A spontaneous evening stroll turned into a spontaneous protest which turned into a spontaneous rocket attack and the spontaneous deaths of four Americans.

The hem kissers in the White House immediately realized that if the truth was revealed about how four Americans’ were abandoned and murdered, this could cause Prince Hope-n-Change to lose his bid for reelection.

As a result, they, along with all the overpaid and underqualified advisors, speech writers, photographers, secretaries, makeup artists, dog walkers, and food tasters would lose their cushy jobs and be forced to work in the real world. Worst of all, their goal of shoving America toward fundamental transformation (destruction) would be delayed or possibly thwarted.

As the facts from the ground came rolling in, it became obvious that cleverly written talking points were needed to divert negative attention away from the Prince. Who better for this creative writing task than Lil' Tommy, official spokesman for the National Security Council?

Courtesy of Author. Courtesy of Author.

Drawing on hours of political experience and his college training in fiction writing, Lil' Tommy rewrote the events of Benghazi. White House spokespeople echoed his fictional scenario, word for word, on multiple radio, television, and press outlets. Pretty soon it became old news, ignored by the media lapdogs.

However, a small but dogged core of reporters and Judicial Watchdogs knew that Americans were being bamboozled, big time. They began to dig for the truth, and thanks to the Freedom of Information Act, they received (after 18 months) a few of the governmental emails transmitted during and immediately after the attack.

These exposed Lil' Tommy’s involvement in the creation of monumentally false and misleading talking points.

A well-respected reporter conducted a revealing video interview with Lil' Tommy. The video was supposed to have been destroyed . . . but, instead, it was leaked to the press.

REPORTER: As spokesperson for the National Security Council, you were responsible for the revised talking points regarding the Benghazi tragedy. Is that correct? For example, you substituted the word “protest” for the word “attack.” Is that correct? And then, you helped rewrite the entire scenario to blame a YouTube video for causing the protest in the first place. Is that correct?

LIL' TOMMY: Like Dude, my job was to provide clarity for everybody who speaks for the White House. Accurate, clear and upbeat. Gotta’ make sure all Americans know the president’s team is workin’ 24/7 to serve, protect, and inform.

REPORTER: Nice slogan, did you write it?

LIL' TOMMY: Yuppidy doo dah, I did.

REPORTER: Any others we might remember?

Courtesy of Author. Courtesy of Author.

LIL' TOMMY: My personal favorite was “Bin Laden is dead. GM is alive. Al Qaeda’s on the run.” One. Two. Three. All happy news.

REPORTER: We lost four brave Americans in an attack on our consulate in Benghazi. And, so far, nobody has been held responsible for the gross leadership failures that allowed this to occur.

LIL' TOMMY: Dude, those are down, down, downer words.

REPORTER: Truth is not always happy news. The loved ones left behind, as well as the American people, want to know why four Americans died. Don’t we owe them the truth?

Courtesy of Author. Courtesy of Author.

LIL' TOMMY: Dude, it’s like, ancient history, right? What difference does it make if a bunch of guys were out walking and decided to blow off a little steam to celebrate the anniversary of 9/11. Since MacDonald’s was closed, they headed for the consulate. It just got out of hand, that’s all.

REPORTER: Guys out for a walk carry rocket launchers?

LIL' TOMMY: Hey, Libya’s a dangerous country, you know. Lions, tigers, and bears and all that. Well, maybe not bears. Everybody carries weapons.

REPORTER: There were real time reports from the ground while the consulate was under attack. Despite repeated requests for assistance, no one responded. Where was the president? In the situation room?

LIL' TOMMY: Ah, no, not really.

REPORTER: Where was he?

LIL' TOMMY: Don’t know. I wasn’t his baby sitter. It’s a big building. He wasn’t wearing a tracker. Maybe he was, like, rehearsing teleprompter speeches for his campaign trip to Vegas.

REPORTER: Was Secretary of State Clinton in the situation room?

LIL' TOMMY: Ah, no, not really.

REPORTER: Where was she?

LIL' TOMMY: Don’t know. For sure, I didn’t baby sit her. Geez! She’s older than my grandmother.

REPORTER: So, to clarify. After the Benghazi consulate attack by mortar and rocket fire, you were called in to make “stylistic adjustments” to the talking points that were presented live on five Sunday morning TV talk shows. Is that correct?

LIL' TOMMY: Dude, I guess. It’s been two years, I don’t remember the exact flow of events.

REPORTER: Actually, it’s been 20 months. Who requested you to make stylistic adjustments to the talking points?

LIL' TOMMY: Sorry dude, can’t remember exactly who.

REPORTER: Hmmm. One more thing. Writing factual talking points on behalf of the President of the United States is an important job for an experienced communicator. You graduated college with a degree in . . . political science?

LIL' TOMMY: Ah no, not really. Fiction. I earned a Master’s Degree in fiction. But . . . but . . . I learned tons of stuff about press releases and talking points from listening to the reporters when I drove the Obama press bus in 2008.

REPORTER: Interesting. Your training and background is in writing fiction, which by definition, has no basis in fact.

LIL' TOMMY: Aw c’mon Dude. Don’t go there.

REPORTER: Just to clarify. In this situation where an American consulate was attacked and four Americans were killed, you revised the reality of the situation to divert blame away from the president and the Secretary of State. And, your words of fiction, which had no resemblance to the truth of the situation, grossly misled the public.

LIL' TOMMY: That’s harsh Dude. You’re hurting my feelings.

REPORTER: Cut it out. Stop crying. Take your thumb out of your mouth. We’re on camera.

CUT. CUT. CUT.

Courtesy of Author. Courtesy of Author.

The end of this story, but perhaps the beginning of another one: the true story about Benghazi.

P.S. Additional political stories are available in a FREE download of my book about Uncle SCAM. Use these stories to help you begin conversations with the less-aware people in your universe. Like Glenn Beck recommends: “entertain first, enlighten second.”

TheBlaze contributor channel supports an open discourse on a range of views. The opinions expressed in this channel are solely those of each individual author.

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