A reality TV star took to Instagram to explain why she chose life for her son when she was faced with an unplanned pregnancy.
Lifetime’s “Knocked Up” premiered Tuesday evening, and its audience met Audra, 32, described as a former party girl facing an unexpected pregnancy. Despite her mother’s disapproval and the father’s refusal to be involved, Audra decided to raise her baby, Zane, on her own. But it wasn’t always easy, according to her social media posts.
"This wasn't the plan I had for myself and everything is about to change." Watch Audra's story tonight on the premi… https://t.co/Uya12rpiPf— Lifetime (@Lifetime) 1481038323.0
In a February Instagram post, Audra shared an image of her ultrasound and detailed the “journey” that led her to motherhood.
“I am writing this as a voice: A voice for other ladies that may be going through the same issue and can relate,” the post states. “A voice for those who don’t yet have a voice. I am going to be very candid with my experience. I am a single woman, not in a committed relationship. I am not married, and do not have a boyfriend. However, due to some recent events last November, I ended up pregnant.”
Audra wrote that she had been under the impression that she wouldn’t be able to have children and was so shocked to discover her pregnancy that she threw the test across the counter. She added that when she told her baby’s father about the pregnancy, “he was very clear that we were NOT to keep this child.”
“I was in such shock, I had NO idea what to do,” Audra wrote. “What girl dreams of being a single mother — one that was not even in a committed relationship at that? This was never something I planned for myself, never a position I saw myself in.”
Audra wrote that she struggled to make a decision about whether or not to proceed with the pregnancy because she thinks a child deserves “a loving mother and father” and she felt that “this was not the time to have a child.”
“So that was it — and then IT happened,” she wrote:
I am a religious person and believe in power greater than myself, one I like to call God. I had been praying for God to send me a sign — PLEASE LET ME KNOW if I was making the right decision. And right then, the song “Sweet Child of Mine” by Guns and Roses came on my radio. This song was NEVER on the stations I listened to BEFORE then, and has not been on since. I took it as a sign that I needed to keep my baby. It was the “sweet child of mine.” God would be with me through it all. I would never be alone. With his help, I could do this. It was MY time to be a mom. Remember, I was told I could never have children, so why NOW?
“I wish I could say that that was the end of the story, and a happily ever after immediately followed, but that is just not my reality,” Audra added, writing that she considered giving her baby up for adoption and she struggled with depression during her pregnancy.
She wrote that as her “mood became worse and worse,” her family didn’t want her around.
“They started screaming at me and telling me what a bother I was,” she wrote. “Let me just put it out there: this is NOT — I repeat NOT what you should tell an emotional, pregnant, single female! I about LOST my mind.”
Audra wrote that although it was one of the lowest points in her life, she knew that “God was going to help me, and I was going to raise this child and do the best that I could!”
“I wanted to share my journey because one thing I know for sure, is that I am NOT alone,” she wrote. “If you, or someone you know is struggling with pregnancy, and wanted someone to talk to, in private or in person, PLEASE feel free to reach out to me! I am an ear who would LOVE to listen. Women like me need the support of others. It is crucial. If I have offended anyone with my story, I am sorry you feel that way. I can honestly say, I am NOT sorry it happened. I have a beautiful baby on the way now because of it. So from me and my baby, thank you for letting us share our beautiful journey with you.”
Audra later gave birth to her baby, a son named Zane, which she wrote in a subsequent post “means ‘a gift from God.’”
Audra’s story will be featured as one of three stories of unplanned pregnancies on Lifetime’s “Knocked Up.”