It is with great regret that I report everything is not everything for singer Lauryn Hill.
Hill became eligible for a job in the Obama administration on Thursday when she was charged with "willfully failing to file three years of income tax returns with the IRS." Over that time prosecutors say she earned more than $1.6 million.
On her official Tumblr page, Hill offered up a rock-solid defense:
“For the past several years, I have remained what others would consider underground. I did this in order to build a community of people, like-minded in their desire for freedom and the right to pursue their goals and lives without being manipulated and controlled by a media protected military industrial complex with a completely different agenda..."
That damn military industrial complex. Always screwing with people.
Hill also said going "underground" was to protect herself, family and friends from both "pop culture cannibalism" and "social cannibalism." I think that has something to do with Ozzy Osbourne.
Toward the end of the painfully long explanation, Hill said she "conveyed all of this" when questioned on failing to file her tax returns. "Obviously, the danger I faced was not accepted as reasonable grounds for deferring my tax payments, as authorities, who despite being told all of this, still chose to pursue action against me, as opposed to finding an alternative solution."
Note to self: Cannibalism of any stripe is not grounds for tax evasion.