Jose Canseco 'aggressively' believes in the Second Amendment

Vice has brought on former baseball star, global warming expert and Twitter aficionado Jose Canseco to write a weekly column. I'm not joking.

The column, which will be published every Monday (and by "every Monday," Vice means "until Canseco collapses into his own drool"), is cleverly called "Jose Can Say So." This week, Canseco tackles gun rights, saying he believes "aggressively" in the Second Amendment.

... Anytime Canseco says he "aggressively" believes anything, a crisis hotline operator should be on standby.

More wisdom from Canseco's inaugural column:

The problem with trying to restrict psychopaths’ access to guns is: How do you know what a person qualified to own a firearm intends to do with it? Obviously, something was wrong with the guy who shot all of those innocent people in that movie theater in Aurora. I’m sure it was some psychological issue or depression or drugs—we really won’t know unless they do some blood work on him. ...

You should have the right to protect yourself and bear arms, no questions or ridiculous restrictions. Everyone should be able to carry a gun and show it in public: “Listen, you mess with me, you’re going to get shot.” ...

The endpoint of what I’m saying is that our country has nukes and other countries have nukes, and we don’t have these things because we want to or will use them, really. We have them to deter other countries from using them. On a large scale it works, so why not on a smaller scale? Mutually assured destruction.

Truer words have never been spoken, Canseco.

I leave you with his latest tweet:

My life sucks but it's better than yours

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) August 1, 2012