A traditional conservative. Embracer of Western tradition, civil society, anti-interventionist policies, and classical federalism. Religious heritage is a fountain of wisdom and stability, you say. Your dirty laundry list is illegal immigration, godless communism, authoritarianism, social democracy, and entitlement programs. Time to restore the principles of natural law, transcendent moral order, unity, classicism, and high culture.

You’re in good company at the restaurant with William F. Buckley, Pat Buchanan, Thomas Woods, and Tom Tancredo. Russell Kirk seems to be enjoying the conversation, but is frequently interrupted by phone calls from Robert Novak. Edmund Burke is texting someone with his quill pen. Donald Trump is asking the server about the nuances of the paleo menu.

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