What does happiness look like? This, here, is what happiness looks like:

How do I know this, you ask? Simple, the New York Times told me so. No, but really. The pollsters at Gallup crunched some numbers about what constitutes "the good life," and when the New York Times asked them for "a statistical composite for the happiest person in America, based on the characteristics that most closely correlated with happiness in 2010," here is what Gallup came up with:

He’s a tall, Asian-American, observant Jew who is at least 65 and married, has children, lives in Hawaii, runs his own business and has a household income of more than $120,000 a year.

Then, the real journalism began: the Times tracked down a man who met these criteria by, it seems, calling up some random synagogues. I wonder how that phone conversation went:

NYT: "Hello, I'm with the New York Times. I'm looking for an older Jewish man. Six figure income. Taller than average."

Rabbi: "Uh yes. Let me think. Have you tried JDate?"

Anyhow, the Times eventually found a man who met Gallup's criteria: Alvin Wong in Hawaii.

When approached by the Times about being the happiest man alive, Wong had this to say: "This is a practical joke, right?”

One last thing…
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