Glenn Beck and his radio co-hosts on Wednesday ruthlessly mocked homesick French jihadists who wrote letters to their families complaining, among other things, that their iPods have stopped working.
"In a series of letters seen by Le Figaro newspaper, some of the 376 French currently fighting in Syria have begged their parents for advice on how to return," Beck explained.
"I've basically done nothing but hand out clothes and food," one of the jihadists wrote. "I also clean weapons and transport dead bodies from the front. Winter has arrived here. It's begun to get really hard."
"I'm fed up. They make me do the washing," another added.
"Wait a minute," Beck said mockingly. "'I thought we were going out and behead people and stuff! I got to clean the dishes?'"
Some of the jihadists have actively tried to return to France, and many of those who weren't beheaded by their Islamist commanders first are now languishing in prison. According to Le Figaro, no politician wants to risk accepting the Islamic State fighters, in case they are involved in a subsequent terror attack.
Beck imagined the jihadists explaining why they want to return: "No, no, guys -- I didn't know we weren't going to have iPods! I mean, I thought we were just going to help them lose their head. I didn't know I had to lose my phone!"
"Can I tell you something? This is great news for the west," Beck said. "This is really great news."
"You know what this is? Capitalism winning," Stu Burguiere added. "In the end, capitalism wins because they want these things. They like this lifestyle. All the things they claim to despise -- look at what happened to Occupy Wall Street. It was the same situation."
"They were all there yelling about Steve Jobs," Beck agreed. "They were all yelling about how evil corporations [are], but they were all on their Apple iPhones."
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