If you thought Michael Bloomberg's attempt to crack down on soda was bad, wait til you get a load of this story from Fox Nation.

The Portland, Maine school district has apparently decided, for no apparent reason, that the iconic soft drink Coca Cola is an offense against nature. And for that reason, they have moved to ban the sale of the drink at football games.

And that's not all. The school also apparently has banned the sale of potato chips and buttered popcorn, instead instructing its students to eat (wait for it) baked tortilla chips, reduced fat string cheese, and hummus. At a football game.

Screenshots of the school's policy can be viewed below:

“We’re taking it to another level,” Chanda Turner, Portland’s school health coordinator, told Fox News. “We’re not going to sell soda and it doesn’t matter who it’s to.”

“We are not making any restrictions on personal choice,” she added. “The only thing we are affecting is – what are we as a school system going to sell or provide.”